I Told the Stars about You

Chapter 11- I want to fly

A/N: Dear readers, this is one of my FAVOURITE chapters. I think I may have cried a little while writing it. Hopefully, you love it as much as I do xxx

I hadn't talked to Rose. A week had passed and I hadn't even seen her. It seemed like she was skipping our exams on purpose, but anyone who knew her would know there was an alterior motive. My mind wandered to Jason as my feet kicked the soil in the shady path. She's okay. I tried to remind myself of that every day I didn't see her, every day I looked around school in case she was hiding out in a different classroom, every day I woke and wished for her scent, her touch, after having dreams of her in that pool- god- she looked so- I made good by stopping that line of thoughts when it reached me because I knew it wouldn't do me any good. And somehow, I managed to stop those thoughts, but I couldn't stop worrying.

So I went to a place where I could think when Thursday's last period finished. I went to the cliff edge where I talked with the Hazel-eyed girl who told me Rose's story.

And I was supposed to be alone. I was supposed to come up with a plan on how to help Rose, how to get her away from Ryan, how to find her. Just see her. But I didn't have to. Because she was already there.

She was lying down on the edge of the cliff, a centimeter away from death. But her chest rose and fell steadily, as if she found more comfort here than her bed. Tears stained her face, rose petals were cascaded over her body. They are still there now that I've sat next to her. They are still there through our silence. She doesn't aknowledge my presence, and I find myself wondering why I find it comforting to know I'm not chained to expectations. We lie there for hours. I don't check, but the sky changes, and we don't move- we simply relish in each other's company. When she does speak, dusk is bathing us in its beauty.

"I was supposed to die alone" She doesn't move as she says it, and for a moment, I wonder if she's talking to the sky. It's blue, yellow, indigo and clouded over with purple and pink clouds. The sun is an orange- so bright the petals look like they're set alight. I want to touch them and pick them off her body. I want to press my lips to her olive skin and see if she has the rose's taste.

"Ash?"

"Hmm?"

"I was supposed to die alone." As I dont know what to say, I sit in the silence. I let the knowledge sink in that she came here to die. The panic that seizes my chest threatens to paralyze me. And it only grows when I realize I have no control over it.

"But you always show up. I don't know how. If this were anyone else, I'd consider throwing them off the cliff" Her smile could break the universe. It could set the world right. I find myself grinning back.

"If this were any other situation, I'd consider laughing. But I'm going to ask you if-"

"Don't be a policeman." She turns to be, opens her eyes and stares at me, unfazed. It's scary, how much intent she holds. How much fire she possesses. "Don't try to save me. I hate it when people treat someone suffering through this stuff like they are fragile, like they are some glass figurine that's going to break. I can't stand it, I'm not-" My fingers find themselves against her lips. They are so soft, that for a second, all thoughts empty out of my head. But I force myself to think of the situation at hand.

"I was just going to ask if I could lie next to you. Can I?" I pull my hand away reluctantly, missing the heat of her breath "Rose?"

For a minute, I could swear she seemed frozen, breathless, unable to comprehend me. Then she nods and turns to her side to face me, her face a hand's length away from mine.

"Sometimes I don't understand you, Ash. You're a puzzle. You're holding all the pieces but they are in disarray. I can't seem to put them together" She says "I understand why Cassie loved you so much. Talked about you so much. You listen. You see. You're the kind of person I want to be in another life." A deep breath, then she turns back to the sky, a part of her body already off the cliff  "I'm telling you this because I can't stand the possibility of you never knowing. I will remember you after this. I will watch over you- if there's such a thing. We could have been something if I wasn't missing my pieces"