Another Look

Chapter 9

Rory and Logan finished their dinner in silence, both grasping the dilemma at hand.

They walked back towards Rory's hotel through the warm but slightly damp spring evening stopping at a park bench in a small park.

"You realize that you are the one holding all the cards, right?" Logan said, having analyzed the situation like he would've done with any one of his work assignments needing to be solved.

"I know," she sighed.

"You need to talk to Finn, he doesn't deserve to be kept in the dark about how you feel, especially with that ring on your finger," he said, pausing. "Tell him about your plans with your studies. You are risking not only your relationship with him by avoiding talking to him about the things you are conflicted about, but also potentially the guardianship of your daughter in the long run," he said straightforwardly.

"God, I haven't even thought that far, Logan," Rory said, tearing up.

"It doesn't have to go that far. Finn is not a monster, he's a decent guy, but just talk to him," Logan assured her.

"I will," she promised.

"From my side, I can tell you that if you need me, I'll be here. Maybe it'll make things easier for you, maybe worse, but you need to know that I haven't been able to move on from you, not fully. Even Finn knows this, and I doubt he'll feel great hearing about us seeing each-other but for what it is worth, I will keep my promise to him that I am not going to make things harder for you by starting something that you later may deeply regret," Logan confessed, understanding that his position in this was the weaker one, it was potentially Rory's young family versus him. He knew that by getting his hopes up he'd likely be getting hurt all over again.

"You got married, Logan," she said, with tears in her eyes.

"And look how wonderfully that turned out," he stated, trying to laugh at his own expense.

"I thought we were done, I honestly did, I did move on. Or at least I pushed this into some far corner of my mind. Hell, I had a kid," she cried.

"Did you know that, when I first found out that I was pregnant, I actually thought it might have been yours? But it was such a relief that it wasn't - just because it would've messed up your life completely," she added, sobbingly.

"I hoped you would have messed up my life, frankly," he replied, looking up at her.

"Oh, Logan, why does my life have to be such a mess?" she cried. Why was it that she could love two men, but she wasn't able to love her own daughter as easily?

"Come here," he said, pulling her up from the bench and wrapping his arms around her, holding her tightly. "Just try to breathe, it's going to be alright. You'll figure it out. You have time to figure it out," he added.

***

"Mom, can you come and get Leah tonight?" Rory asked with tears in her throat as she drove back to Hartford the next day, adding, "I should get there around 6."

"Sure, why, what's wrong?" Lorelai asked, hearing from her voice that something was up.

Rory had pushed it through her reading that afternoon by trying not to think about it, she needed to keep at it until she got there, or she'd end up crying again. But she still had 90 miles to go.

"I just need to talk to him," she said, not wanting to go too much into detail over the phone.

***

"Hi Finn," she said, kissing him briefly. "Where's Leah?" she asked.

"Hi love," he greeted. "Sleeping, she was really off her schedule today, but she should be up in about an hour or so," he explained.