Countryhumans Oneshots

Coffee

Coffee Trio (AKA Washington, Massachusetts, and New York), requested by SmashingAsh98

"Who the FUCK messed with my coffee?" New York yelled as he stomped around the house. Virginia groaned.

"Great, this is exactly what we needed." She muttered before standing up to find New York. Someone had to stop him before he threw someone through a wall again.

Never get between New York and his coffee. Or Washington and his coffee. Or Massachusetts and his (Dunkin's) coffee.

You can get between Dad and his coffee. Dad will just find some other caffeine-filled drink to drink way too much of.

But that Coffee fanatics known as the Coffee Trio? Get between them and coffee, and you will die.

"FUCK! New York, I didn't take your fucking coffee! Sleep for once in your damn life, and then you won't need as much coffee, you power-hungry entitled dick!" Virginia heard New Jersey say, followed by his very colorful vocabulary.

"New Jersey, just tell him if you messed with his coffee," Virginia heard Washington say as she turned the corner to see what was happening. Massachusetts somehow managed to hold New Jersey against the wall, and New York glared at New Jersey with exhausted eyes. Washington stood on the opposite wall, messing around on his phone but clearly still paying attention to what was going on.

"New York," Virginia said, walking over and catching the attention of her four brothers.

"What?" said State snapped, turning to face Virginia, looking one wrong move from a murder attempt.

"What happened?" Virgina asked. New York scowled.

"My coffee is fucking decaffeinated. And I need caffeine." New York said. Oh, who did that? That was a horrible idea.

"You have an addiction to coffee. So do you, Wash and Mass," Virginia said. New Jersey laughed, and New York's scowl deepened.

"So what if we do? That doesn't give anyone the right to mess with our coffee." Massachusetts claimed. Virginia rolled her eyes.

"Y'all are so dramatic. Listen, York, how much sleep did you get last night?" Virginia asked.

"I didn't sleep last night." He said. Virginia sighed.

"Okay, first, go to sleep." She began before being cut off by New York.

"No."

"And second, are you sure you didn't mess up your coffee because you are tired and cranky?" Virginia asked.

"Yes! And I'm not cranky!" New York protested. New Jersey snorted.

"Then what do you call this then?" The Garden State asked.

"An interrogation." Washington, Massachusetts, and New York responded.

"It's weird seeing you and Mass get along," New Jersey said with a sigh, looking resigned. He was probably expecting to be stuck here for a while.

"I might not like Yorkie all that much, but at least we can agree on coffee," Massachusetts said, and New Jersey smirked.

"What's the best coffee shop?" He asked. Why's he asking that?

"Dunkin' Donuts."

"Starbucks."

"Don't care."

Oh, right, those three are coffee addicts, but they can't agree on coffee shops.

"Washington, I forgot you like Starbucks, and now I'm horrified."

"Listen, Mass I'm Washington State; how can I not like Starbucks? At least I have a favorite coffee shop!"

"Oh, come on, it doesn't matter that much where the coffee comes from!" Massachusetts had let go of New Jersey, who stood up and walked over to me as the argument became more intense.

"Well, that was easy," he said. Virginia rolled her eyes as she turned to leave the fight.

"Did you really mess with Apple's coffee?" She asked. New Jersey laughed and shook his head.

"That was Delly. He's trying to get New York to sleep, so he's sabotaged York's sources of caffeine." New Jersey explained.

"Well, let's hope York doesn't find out about that; otherwise, Delaware will die."