Love Letter

Lynne:

I was falling... And I was falling quickly. My life momentarily was better than my dreams, and I was scared I would wake up with it all back to normal. I was afraid I would awake without him there and him being just a memory. It was terrifying. Terrifying since he was in control and I barely knew him. The last few days have been wonderful, and I had only seen a sweet side to him, but there was something still in the back of my mind telling me this was not right. Making me think I should not jump feet first, not knowing where this would go, even though that is all I wanted to do. I wanted to take a leap of faith with Ian.

"So your brother is going to take his wife out to eat now?" Ian says, glancing back at me in the kitchen.

I shrug. "I guess so." We had been at my brother's house for a few hours while watching the two boys. I had thought I would be at Keith's house for an hour and a half tops. That was until I received a phone call asking if it was okay if they went shopping together. The next time instead of receiving a phone call, I received a text from Keith saying they would grab a bite to eat; he followed it up with thanks. I had a feeling that he and Carolyn did not get much downtime when he was back at their real house and he was working. I could not be upset if they pushed the limit, especially since this was the first time I had ever babysat their boys. I must be pretty trustworthy.

"So, what will we eat?" Ian asks next since it was close to seven o'clock at night. Checking the kitchen for ingredients, I knew the answer immediately.

"Grilled Cheese," I say, grabbing the bread, butter, and cheese. While I make enough sandwiches for the four of us, the boys and Ian sit at the table drawing. I was on the fifth sandwich just if the boys wanted another one when Ian's arms were around my stomach. He was becoming very comfortable grabbing and holding onto me, which made me more nervous. It did not help that my senses were on overdrive whenever he touched me or was near me. Just like now, his arms around me send sparks shooting throughout me. This was a new feeling, just like all my emotions toward Ian. We had kissed very little, but each kiss left my body wanting more. Stepping out of his embrace, I glance at the boys letting Ian know not in front of them. I had barely spent any time with my nephews, and I had no clue what Keith and Carolyn were like in front of them. If Keith was anything like my dad – Joseph and Zeke had seen plenty. If he was more conservative like my mother – they had seen very little.

The sandwiches were a hit with the boys like I had hoped. We make our way to the family room to watch a movie after we eat. I assisted the seating and decided to stay clear of sitting next to Ian; my mind needed room to think. With him near, all I could concentrate on was him. When I plop down across from Ian after putting the movie in, I see the disappointment flash through his eyes. It vanishes away as soon as Zeke plops down next to him, talking about Monster University.

"Lynne," I hear while being shaken awake. I can listen to the familiar laugh and wince, thinking I had fallen asleep at Ian's again. The embarrassment of walking into the living room that morning receiving looks from my entire family as I walked up to my bedroom was all I could handle until I got back to my safe zone in New York City.

"Oh no," I say while looking around and realizing I am in Keith's family room and relaxing.

"You know most of the time you are a closed book, but when you wake up, your face says everything," Ian says, kneeling in front of me. "Come on, let's get you home."

I say very little on the way home, which feels like forever since it is forty minutes from my mom's house. Without thinking, when we pull into the driveway, I am unfastening my belt so I can make a quick getaway. Ian is ahead of me, grabbing my arm before escaping out of the car. "What are your plans for tomorrow?" he asks, now taking my hand in his and the tingles returning from the small skin contact.

"I don't know yet...." I say, looking at the dashboard, "it's one in the morning – my mind is focusing on sleep."

"You slept all night," he says, and I think I can hear impatience in his tone.

"How about you text me tomorrow?" I say, and he agrees to this.

I was ready for bed when I was in the warm car, and the ride made me sleepier, but I could not sleep after changing into my pajamas. I scan my bookshelves, looking for a good read. I was looking for anything other than a romance when I started my search, but I ended up taking out my very first River Cannon novel I had purchased. It was my senior summer when I had picked this book up at the Book Store since Mrs. Frankel recommended it. This was before everything had occurred, and I made sure to stuff it in my suitcase before sending it away by my mother. It was close to four years ago since reading it – it was my favorite out of his novels. That month I was gone, I had read it over a billion times it had seen since it would have been considered as contraband. This novel, no matter what, would have a special place in my life.

I knew I would end up crying by the end of the book, and I knew a good cry was precisely what I needed. I had sworn I would never read another one of his books after I had broken down after reading The Last Dream. I picked it up the next day and started to reread it. A businessman, Mark Richards, has to hire a new sectary since he is retiring. He decides to let his retiring sectary, Jane, who had been his dad's and seemed more like an aunt, take on the process of finding him a new one. However, the aunt, like the sectary, Jane, sees this as an opportunity to bring a little love into his life. Jane picks out a woman that would be more appropriate as a girlfriend and one that would be a long-life love. Of course, that is what the new sectary, Greta, ends up being, even though they had different thoughts in the beginning and tried to fight it like crazy. However, Greta quits abruptly, and it takes Mark six months to quit being stubborn and to find her. That is when the novel leads to an abundance of tissues being used and crying since when Mark finally finds Greta, she has cancer and that even with all the money he has, he will not be able to save her. He takes her on a trip all over Italy, the last thing on her bucket list to do. And, of course, Mark fights away all of his demons and how much he loves her all the way to her last dying breath. She dies in his arms while they take a stroll in the morning; her last words after her telling him how much she loves him is "Thanks for the last dream."