Secret baby (Old Version)

Chapter 31

Alic's POV:

"W-what?" I was surprised to hear this. Is he trying to say he likes me? I mean we have been friend since forever, and he never hinted or told me. "Maybe you weren't meant to be with Matt, maybe you were meant to have Zoey with him. Other then that, your fairy tale might be meant to start with someone else."

Why would Shawn want me? I have a kid with his best friend. I have barley anytime to go out with my friends, but to be honest I rather stay in with my princess. "Shawn...I...Do you like me?" I let out.

He looked down for a moment before looking up at me again. "Yes, I've had a crush on you since 6th grade. I remember the day I finally realized I did have a crush on you. It was the day you had to present the project about love in science. Why people fall in love and stuff. You wore blue jeans with knee holes and a Justin Bieber tee shirt. Your hair was straightened. I remember the words you said too." He went on.

"You said you don't fall in love with attraction. It's the feeling. The feeling of being safe and feeling loved. You also explained, that everyone had their own definition of love. Love to you means that person is always there for you, you have to be able to trust them. Be able to feel safe and talk about anything and everything in the world. To be able to look at them and see a future." He took my left hand in his right one.

"Honestly Aliczandreia, I look at you and I see a future. A future with us and Zoey. A future with Matt of course, he's Zoey's father. I can talk to you about anything. My only goal, is to make you feel safe and loved." I didn't notice how close we were. I didn't notice anything, but Shawn and his words.

He really remembers all of that? It was an easy, but fun project. I loved to talk about love. I found it interesting. Shawn wrapped his warm arm around my waist, making me shiver in joy.

I trust Shawn, I feel safe with Shawn. Now, that I look into his eyes...I can see an amazing future. A future were I don't have to worry about people leaving, a future were I know I'm loved.

He pulled me closer, lifting me up and siting me on his lap. I instantly put my right hand on his face. His amazingly brown eyes filled with so much emotion. I was fascinated by him.

Unwrapping is arm from my waist, he brought his hand up to my face. His thumb rubbed my cheek.

What am I doing? I was just all over Matt and now I'm with Shawn? I'm terrible, but I can't help it. Shawn said all the right things and his eyes just confirmed that what he was saying was true. I felt different with Shawn. It feels big. It feels right, with Matt I'm confused.

I feel pressured with Matt, like I should be with him just because he's Zoey's father. I have some feelings for him, but my mind is just confused. With Shawn I feel opened, like I could be with him because I do have feelings for him.

" I never really forgot about you." He whispered in my ear. What? I knew he remembered me, but I actually thought he forgot me just for a little while. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"Alic I liked you for a while. Since 6th grade, to now. I'm 16. You are 17. That's a long time, I've met a lot of beautiful girls. None of them took the place in my heart that you hold. You will always be in that place. When I seen you in the candy shop in California, with a daughter. I felt hurt. I felt jealous that someone else touched you. That someone else created Zoey and not me. I wanted to be the one you wanted to create a family with. I did the only thing that came to my mind that moment, to forget. I thought if I pretended to forget you and not know you. My feelings would fade, but they didn't and it drove me crazy to not be able to talk to you about why you left." Hurt filled his eyes while explaining.

"You might think of me as a creeper, but when you left without telling anyone. I kind of just zoned out. I didn't get out of bed, sometimes I would forget where I was driving to and get loss. All the guys kind of went crazy, except Cameron. Man, he was over crazy. That dude, he looked at every place in town. Once he didn't find you. He became not himself. He would cry in the middle of class. He also got in trouble a lot. He has a past and almost every police officer at home knows him."
Wow...I didn't mean to hurt anybody.

"I'm sorry I left, I was thinking about myself and Matt. I should have left a message or something." I regret leaving, I should have faced my fear and tell Matt. I just feared Zoey's future if I did do that.

Shawn pulled me closed to him, where there was no space between us. He kissed my forehead and hugged me. Shawn was always shy, but for some reason he was always comfortable with me. "It's okay, at least you're here now."

The door opened again, but I didn't move. I didn't want too. I don't care if it's Matt. I don't wanna play anymore games. I want something real. I want something I've been wishing for, for so long. Something real, with someone real.

"Shawn you're up....oh I'm sorry, didn't mean to interrupt." Jack Johnson spoke. I look up and smile at him.

"Jack come sit down. I haven't talked to you in a long time." I told him. Jack smiled and walked toward us. I got off Shawn so he could get up. "Go do your thing." I smiled at Shawn.

He smiled back and promised me he would be back. Once he was out of sight, I sat back down in the seat.

"How are you?" I asked him. I haven't talked to the Jacks since I came back. I wanna know how they feel. "I'm fine. How are you?"

"Are you lying to me? Jack Johnson, you better tell me the truth. How are you?" I asked again, just a bit slower. Ever since we were teens, I could tell when Jack was lying. Nobody could read him but me. It made me feel special.

He sighed. "Honestly right now, I don't know." He looked a bit...mad.
This is rare. We barely see Jack mad.
"First, Zandi I wanna talk-." I interrupted him. "Please don't call me Zandi."

His eyes went soft for a second, before hardening again. "Alic you left! Then after you put us through the worst, you come back and don't even talk to Jack and I. I'm mad. I feel kind of hurt. Then second, I come up here and see you and Shawn. Aren't you with Matt?" He questioned.

"I'm not with Matt and I'm sorry! IM SORRY! I made a mistake. I'm human Jack, a lot has been on my mind and I'm stressed. I wanna be mad, I wanna blame someone else. Now that I have thought about it, I wish I hadn't left! But I did! IM SORRY I DIDN'T SAY GOODBYE, I'M SORRY I WANTED TO PROTECT MATT AND ZOEY! I'm sorry. Is that what you wanna hear? That I'm sorry?" My side started to hurt. I was mad and in panic.

"Alic calm down please."

"I can't calm down. I'm so stressed, that I'm mad. You know how I am Jack, I don't know how to express my anger. Yelling just isn't enough. If I don't let it out, I cry. I don't like crying. It makes me feel opened and weak." The anger lessened, but my sadness was rising.

I wanted to cry. I kept blinking fast so no tears will fall. "I want Shawn." I fell into the back of my chair and closed my eyes. "I'm sorry Alic." He apologized and I soon heard the door open and close once more.

The pain in my side faded as O calmed down, but now that I'm alone. I let the tears fall.

I'm broken. I've been since I was 10. I now just wish someone would help me get fixed. Maybe that someone was Shawn. He's right, my fairy tale was twisted.

Now, it's fixed and leading me in the right path. Shawn is now my Prince Charming. Just now, there is not dragon. Just Me stuck in a tower waiting for Shawn to arrive with Zoey. (A/n She said with Zoey because Zoey helps fix her heart.)

Maybe I'm dreaming, but this felt to real. Maybe I will wake up and I will be at home with Zoey again, with nobody trying to take her from me. With me having a healthy liver.

But like I said...this feels to real.