Does it Hurt?

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That's what people ask . I say I doesn't hurt you just feel really down and you don't feel like you can get up. So no is your answer. You just have to deal with yourself. Sometime its okay to deal with yourself and other times its not. But yeah depression sucks. So does anxiety cause you can have those at anytime worse for me is when I get touched by a person who broke me Ina thousands piece. I'm trying so hard to let people hug me and like touch me (not in that way.). But I feel its really hard when I'm around my exboyfriend Darrius. Cause every time he around me he hugs me like we use to when were close. So every time he hugs me now I push him away and later I will cry or sometimes I cry right there the worst is when I yelled at him . I didn't mean to it was just my anger that he broke up with me and wants to act like nothing happened. Well news flash something happened you fucking broke me your the one that made me start recutting. And cry myself to sleep and hate hearing "Stay with me" by Sam smith. But yeah you real hurt me. Now I have someone that's trying to fix me witch. I don't know if that's really going to happen cause I am really broke. But if does he my everything than. Its just hard to deal with everything that's happen. God you know writing this has made me cry and it doesn't help that my cousin playing stay with me in his room. Fuck what less can remind me of him. Fuck him he hurt me and I'm just pushing my self back to remember what happened and the only true people that help me out of that is my boyfriend and Payton D and Bri B. I'm going to end this here cause I'm tired as fuck. And love you all. And j guess thanks for the 1.3k. Love ya : )
But yeah I'm going to make a little point at this ending . leave the past now . I need to remember that. I have a hard problem with that anyways night.

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