What goes on.

I dont know.

What people don't know about me. But they always act like they do. Lots of days I wish never to go to school. Some days I even wish I wasn't alive but some how I am. But little do people know me. But they judge me so quick. What little do they know it hurts me. But they wouldn't cause they never knew the real me.  What they don't know is I  try my best to keep myself alive everyday. But you don't help pushing me down or telling me I should kill myself. Or even blocking me like some people. I would love to put your name in this book. Because I know your reading it but to yourself you don't think your hurt me. Look around next time you see me alone see if I'm smiling acting happy. Next time see if I'm not at the edge of crying. But I know you wouldnt so why should I even. Be reading this, what I think is so funny is that you think I'm okay. Haven't you seen my scares and if you do than do you think I'm okay. I may call you a bitch yes but maybe because your acting like one to me. And its not like you haven't said shit about me around other people or posted it. I don't have anyone any more that knows me well not since my best friends died. I won't let anyone in cause it hurt when someone you let in takes everything they know about you and use it against you.  Yeah it hurts like hell I will give you that much I haven't been me for so long I lost myself. But you wouldn't know because all your doing is hurting me. So maybe you should just leave me alone to die in peace. But I know that won't happen. For now fuck you meadow for fucking hurting me all these year. You don't know how the fuck I fell you been a bitch to me since I start that school. What have I ever don't to deserve this. And Payton  I know you mom don't like me so  I will do my best to stay away from you. I'm sorry but if your mom don't like me then I shouldn't be around you cause she will think I'm going to get you in trouble the only reason why she doesn't like me is cause of my past well you know why that's the past sorry to say but I'm changing slowing. If only you mom could see. And understand me and why I did what I did in the past. But for now guy I have homework to get done and it 12:18 a.m. so yeah night and stop judging me.