Intricate: The Beginning of Us| MARKNOMINHYUCK(bxbxbxb)

Prologue: Farewell my delusions

Jaemin

As soon as I get home, I go upstairs, not in the mood to even greet my mother like I usually do. I ignore the shout calling for me from my brother's room as well and walk straight into mine. I sigh in exasperation as I take a seat on the end of my bed, staring blankly ahead.

I saw Lee Jeno kiss a girl today and that's not normal. He may be what people label as a 'bad boy'; getting into fights, disrespecting people, etc but he's not a fuckboy and most definitely not a player.

Then I saw Mark Lee at the library, tutoring a girl. It's normal, he always tutors younger students but I can't deny that him putting his attention on people made me slightly jealous. Which I have no right in feeling. Because we're nothing, we haven't even had a conversation. He's my math class TA but I doubt he has ever even noticed me. I sit at the back of the class and the teacher barely ever walks through there which thus why he never does as well. Plus, it's not like I make the effort. I hate asking for help and I stand by that.

Lastly, today, Lee Donghyuk came out as bisexual and I don't know how to feel about that one. At least, I feel a little hopeful now knowing that the handsome barista at the nearby cafe could take an interest in me but then competition is now up and rising.

Who wouldn't be interested in these three god-like, attractive boys?

I sigh, 'Give up, give up, give up,' I chanted and I finally gave into myself.

'I'm giving up.'

It's not right to try to be optimistic in this illusion that I have. This illusion that three insanely popular boys would ever like me as I like them. It's a stupid illusion that I had made myself think could come true for the last year and gosh am I wrong. Especially when all I do is look at them from afar.

I'm stupid and this illusion is stupid. And it's time to give it up.