Intricate: The Beginning of Us| MARKNOMINHYUCK(bxbxbxb)

34: I HAVE to forget

Jeno

"Donghyuck, honey, you look a little out of it. Maybe you should go lay down?" His mother asks as she gently puts down her utensils. Her voice was warm and caring but her eyes show 'compose yourself or leave.' If there was anything that I knew about the other Lee's as well as my parents, it's that they care about manners. Part of those manners include putting attention to people when they are speaking to you. Something Donghyuck wasn't doing. His eyes were looking down at his food and his chopsticks were pushing food around. If I had to bet, his parents hadn't noticed that he hasn't put even a piece into his mouth. "Mrs. Lee was just asking you something," she continues, half-stern, half-concerned.

I clear my throat, effectively catching everyone's attention. "We'll go up to his room."

The two women exchange worried glances after looking between the two of us while our fathers continue to indulge in a conversation. Donghyuck looks at me and I look at Donghyuck as if we were asking each other what to do next. We continue to have intent eye contact for a couple of more seconds, neither of us backing out until he looks away.

"I'll- I'll lead the way," Donghyuck mumbles, excusing himself from the table with his head cast down. 

Frankly, I was shocked. If it weren't for the fact that I was skillfully trained to remain stoic in even the most surprising of situations, I would've physically flinched at his behavior. His voice was so incredibly weak, so vulnerable, it was nothing I had seen before. Instead, I decide on forming a frown on my face as I trail behind him.

As always, the walk was quiet but it seemed different. Something was different and I couldn't help but be curious. Concerned...? No, that thought was laugh-worthy.

When we arrive, we take our usual positions though contrary to normal, Donghyuck doesn't throw himself on his bed. Instead, he takes slow, weak steps and then carefully lies down on his back. His eyes stay wide open and he places both of his hands on top of his stomach. 

I knew better than to dwell, of course. 

I take a book from the bookcase next to the couch before taking a seat. I open the book, and the first page before finding myself glancing up. What could possibly be going through that boy's head? What could have him so out of it? He seemed so strange. This just didn't seem like Donghyuck.

It's the first time I've seen him like this. This was someone that I thought was nothing but happy but right now he was proving me wrong. Donghyuck seemed so so far away that even an earthquake wouldn't possibly bring him back.

I look back down at his book with a small head shake. It isn't for me to worry. 

Time goes by in silence. The only thing that could be heard throughout the room was the flipping of papers every once in a while and Donghyuck's drumming of fingers in his stomach. Slowly, the silence began to frustrate me. The seconds seemed to be going impossibly slow and while I would have welcomed the silence any other day, it was different today.

Just as I was about to stand up and leave, a small voice came from the other side of the room. "Jeno?" The voice says.

I look up just to see Donghyuck now sitting on the bed and looking back at me with glossy, lost eyes. "What?" I respond, rather harshly. It didn't seem that he registered the way that I answered, just the words.

"Date me," he mumbles simply, his words barely audible.

"What?" I ask, fully surprised and confused. "I didn't think you were in the mood to joke around." I scoff before standing up and turning to put the book away but I was stopped when he answers. 

"Please," his voice cracks. 

I turn my body around to look at him. He was looking down at his lap, his form itself was vulnerable, looking smaller than usual, and I could see his lips trembling. He looked scared. So unsure of himself. This definitely isn't Lee Donghyuck. Lee Donghyuck is always sure of himself. Of who he is.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I ask genuinely though I'm not sure it sounded like it. It was rather aggressive, I'll admit. 

"I have to forget him. I need to," he says desperately.

Donghyuck

"I have to get over him," I repeat in a whisper, biting my bottom lip while my mind travels back to the memory of what had happened. Jaemin's lips on mine, the butterflies around my stomach, Jaemin's pale face before he ran away, and his tears. His tears were what seemed to haunt me the most. "I have to get over Mark-Hyung."

"You- you can't just tell me to date you," Jeno sighs in exasperation.

If I'm honest, I'm surprised he hasn't stomped away.

"Please, Jeno," I plead, standing up and walking over to him. I stand right before him, aware that I must look like a complete mess right now and that there were tears welling in my eyes. I couldn't find myself to care, though. "I- I really need this. You're the only one I trust enough to be asking for this. I just," I close my eyes and turn my head down, letting out a heavy breath. "I just really can't with this pain anymore," I confess gloomily. 

What had overcome me to ask him this? I have no idea. Perhaps it was the desperation. The desperation to forget the way that I felt during the kiss Jaemin and I shared. The desperation to stop the hurting, to stop the fear. I just really couldn't deal with it anymore and if there's anyone that can help me with then it's Lee Jeno. He knows about my crush, he has seen me break down over it, and he knows what I have been through so in my mind, he's the best choice. I've known him since I can remember and he has known me too, he seemed like the best person.

"I can't just say yes, Lee Donghyuck," he says coldly.

"You need this too, don't you?" I hate how desperate I sounded. But I was exactly that. "You recently broke up with your ex-girlfriend, I bet you're still hurting. Let's just... just use each other as a distraction," I say, trying my best to convince him. It was low but I knew bringing up his ex was the best way.

I was right. Something went through his eyes. I'm not sure what. Resentment, regret, anger, sadness. 

He stays quiet for a while, just staring at me before he nods. "We'll be together until you find someone else."

"What about you?"

"I don't need anyone."

He turns around and walks away, unaware of the raising heart he left me with.

A/N: Fun fact: I've been planning this scene since I started this book. I am utterly disappointed with how it came out 😭😭