We cut to the middle of Blood Gulch where we see Church has watched up with Donut and aims his rifle at him
Church: Freeze!
Donut: Hey, why the hell were you shooting at me? You could've hit me, dick!
Church: Can it. Don't try to play stupid with me, Sarge. I know who you are. We've been spying on you for three weeks now.
Donut: I just got here two hours ago, and I'm not a sergeant, I'm a private
Church: Wait a minute, you're not the sergeant!
Donut: Yeah, that's what I just said
Church: Well, then how the hell did you manage to steal our flag
Donut: Steal? I have no idea what the hell you're talking about!
Suddenly a soldier in black armor appears between them
???: THREE!
Church: JESUS!
Donut: HOLY SHIT! Who is this guy?
Church: What in the hell? Tucker? Is that you?
Tucker: H-how did you get up here ahead of me?
Donut: And what's with that black shit on your armor?
Tucker: (Looks at Donut) Hey! Freeze, Sarge!
Donut: Would you stop calling me a Seargent? I'm still just a private
Tucker: The sarge is still a private? Oh, my god. The teleporter sent me back in time!
(Meanwhile: Red Base)
We cut to Red Base where we see Lopez working on the Puma until Grif enters the driver seat and suddenly music starts to play and Callan enters the passage seat.
Grif: (Looks at Lopez) Hi, Lopez. We need the jeep
Callan: It's sort of for an emergency
Simmons: I'll take the gunner
Simmons enters the gunner's seat
Simmons: Let's roll
Grif: (Starts to drive) How do you turn off the fucking radio?
Callan: I don't know. I'll try to fix that later
Simmons: Don't worry, Lopez! I'll bring her back in one piece!
Callan: You mean we?
Simmons: Ye-yes
(Meanwhile: With Tucker And Church)
Tucker: (Rambling)Look, I know you don't know me, but you have to believe what I'm about to tell you. Sometime in your future, I get stationed here in Blood Gulch, and we meet. And this guy here, he gets promoted to sergeant of the Red Army, and we spy on them. And they get this new jeep, and I'm all like, "There is no way you can pick up chicks in a tank!"
Church: Tucker, what the fuck are you babbling about?
Tucker: I know all this sounds crazy, but he eventually becomes a Seargent, and then one day we get a tank, and he comes and steals our flag while we're distracted!
Donut: (Looks at Church) Is this guy a retard?
Church: Red, shut up (Looks at Tucker) Tucker, listen to me. You haven't gone back in time, okay? (Music starts to be heard) This is the guy that stole the flag, he's just not the Seargent! (Music gets louder) Turns out he's just some dumb rookie who happens to have the same color armor as him (Music gets louder) He got in somehow, just- (Music gets more louder) FOR GOD SAKE, WHAT IS THAT MUSIC?!
Church and Tucker then look in the direction where the music is coming from and a Puma jumps over the hill
Grif: Woohoo!
Callan: Suprise mother fucker!
Tucker: Holy shit!
Church: Son of a bitch! RUN, JESUS, RUN!
Church and Tucker then begin to run toward the cliffs
Tucker: The jeep followed me back in time!
Simmons then begins to fire the machine gun at them while Callan fires his magnum at them
Church: Ow! Jes-! Ow! Jesus! Ow, ow!
Grif Gets off the Puma and Looks at Donut while Simmons starts to shout something at the blues in the background
Grif: What the hell is going on here?
Donut: You know what, I honestly have no idea what's going on. I think everyone in this canyon is absolutely insane
Callan: (Keeps on firing) How did you get the flag?
Donut: I don't know. I just asked for it
Callan: (Stops firing) And it worked?
Donut: I guess. Is it not supposed to?
Grif: I don't know. We've never even thought to try that. Just take the flag to the base, I'll explain there
Donut: Not until someone tells me what the fuck is go-
Callan: For the love of god! Move rookie! Head to base! Now!
Donut: Fine!
Donut then leaves but in the wrong direction
Grif/Callan: "Annoyed Sigh" Back to our base, dumbass!
Donut: Uh, I know. I just got turned around, that's all
Donut then leaves but this time in the right direction
(Meanwhile: Blue Base)
We cut to the top of blue base where we see Caboose looking through the sniper as he sees Church and Tucker cornered
Caboose: Oh, man. That's not good (Looks at the Puma) Oh my god, that jeep has a really big gun. (Puts the sniper away) Stay here (Looks at the tank) Tank. Stay here. Tank. Ah, screw it.
(Meanwhile: With Church and Tucker)
Church: Well, just wait here. That thing's gotta run outta bullets some time
TO BE CONTINUED...
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Why Are We Here? (Red Vs Blue x Male OC)
FanfictionWelcome to Blood Gulch. Where there are two opposing sides that are in a war, the Blue Team and Red Team, and the soldiers on each side living there................Are all idiots. Follow the red soldier Callan Frazier as he experiences the wonders...
