Slipping Through Our Fingers

Chapter 10: What comes next

The next day Neito woke up and went to make breakfast, concerned when he saw the door open, but soon the concern was turned into sadness.

"I guess I really loved you, all my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew and now you're over there and I'm way over here what am I gonna do..." Hitoshi said in a tired tone as he looked at the sky before he finished his cup of coffee, running his fingers through his hair letting a small sigh.

Neito frowned softly and went to sit down next to him "morning.." he said softly holding Hitoshi's hand.

"Morning.." Hitoshi replied before he rested his head on Neito's shoulder.

"Slept well..?" Neito asked, frowning softly as Hitoshi replied with a small chuckle "didn't slept..." Hitoshi said.

Neito frowned softly not knowing what to say, instead he embraced Hitoshi on a hug, hoping they can recover soon.

It was the day of the funeral.

Hitoshi was looking around for Neito, frowning when he heard something hit the wall next to the bedroom door, sobs soon followed.

"W-Why did you left...why so soon..." Neito mumbled as he cried. Hitoshi looked at the ground figuring Neito threw something but to his surprise he found an open, small velvet box with two rings inside.

He picked it up and frowned before he closed it and went to hug Neito "Nei.." he spoke softly.

"W-Why...e-everything w-was getting better...a-and now he's g-gone.." Neito said between sobs as he leaned on Hitoshi.

"I know Neito...but we have to stay strong...he...he wouldn't want us to be like this.." he mumbled, ignoring the fact that he had been listening to the voices, blaming himself for Denki's death.

The funeral had ended and most people had gone home, the only ones there were Hitoshi's family and Neito. Eri frowned as she placed a yellow flower on the gravestone and went to comfort Hitoshi.

Neito was kneeled in front of the gravestone reading Denki's name over and over, numb tears fell down his face as he stared at the cold gravestone.

He looked up when he felt a hand on his shoulder, his dull eyes met with Aizawa's "let's take you guys home...you two need some rest" he said with a soft yet stern voice.

Neito shook his head looking back at the grave "I wanna stay a little longer.." he mumbled, wiping away the numb tears that fell down his face which made Eri frown softly and hug him.

Aizawa sighed softly and kneeled next to him looking at the grave "I know how you're feeling, and I'm going to be honest...the feeling will never go away, the way you cope with the feelings will define whether or not you get better.."

Neito nodded a bit "I know...I just...don't know how where to start..." he mumbled, "and that's ok, you'll figure that out, it takes time" Aizawa said as both Hitoshi and Neito looked at the grave one last time.

Hitoshi placed his hand on the grave closing his eyes, and taking deep breaths. Neito did the same, touching the cold grave and closing his eyes.

The two stayed like that for a few seconds before standing up "ready to head back home..?" Neito asked Hitoshi who gave him a nod.

The next day both of them were woken up by their phones ringing, the news of Denki's death finally were made public and was spread like wildfire.

Hitoshi became annoyed by the amount of phone calls he was getting and turned both his and Neito's phone off before he pulled Neito close wrapping his arms around him.

"Babe It's 11am we have to get up" Neito said kissing him softly getting a kiss and a small groan in return "we don't have to get up we can stay in bed all day" he mumbled as he snuggled close to Neito hiding his face on Neito's shoulder.

Neito sighed but didn't argued, instead he tried to get up "well I can at least get you something to eat" he said softly kissing Hitoshi's head but was pulled back on bed "I'm not hungry" Hitoshi said wrapping his arms around Neito.

Neito sighed "Hitoshi one thing I'm not having is you not taking care, I'm going to get you food we already skipped breakfast I'm not having you skip lunch"

Hitoshi frowned "I said I'm not hungry" he replied before he mumbled something under his breath "oh no you're not doing that Hitoshi, I'll drag you out of be and force feed you if I have to!"

"Can you stop being so goddamn stubborn?? I said I'm not eating and that's final!" Hitoshi said in anger.

Neito frowned and picked Hitoshi up talking to the kitchen. Hitoshi got down Neito's arms and tried heading back to bed but when he was stopped by Neito where he finally snapped, slapping him across the face.

Neito froze and stood there in shock for a few seconds, tearing up when he processed the fact that Hitoshi had hit him "y-you know what...do whatever the fuck you want I don't care" he mumbled before he started waking out the door.

"Shit Neito wait! I'm sorry I didn't-" Hitoshi spoke as he grabbed Neito's hand but was quickly pulled away from his grip "don't fucking touch me Shinsou. If you want to be this way all because I want to make sure you're alright then so be it but don't fucking talk to me if this is what you chose." He said trying to blink away a few tears and quickly wiping the ones that fell down his face.

As much as he wanted to leave he knew he had to stay home all because of his worry about Hitoshi, so instead of leaving he just headed to his room closing the door and sat in bed resting his head on his hands silently crying.

Hitoshi sighed and frowned "the hell is wrong with me.." he mumbled heading to his room and grabbing a framed picture from his desk.

It was a picture from their first date at the garden, the two blonds looked so happy in the picture. He teared up "why...why did this happen...why us...it isn't fair..." he mumbled looking at the picture as tears fell down his face.

He sighed and put the frame down, going to his desk and grabbing the small box he picked up from when Neito threw it. He then went to Neito's room and sat next to him "Nei...I'm sorry, heck sorry isn't enough...I didn't meant to hit you...I don't know what came over me.." he mumbled looking at him.

Neito was laying in bed and quickly wiped his tears away as Hitoshi walked in, he listened to him and looked over at him "it's fine...I shouldn't had pushed you..." he mumbled before closing his eyes again.

Hitoshi hesitantly took out the small box from his pocket and placed it in front of Neito "I think that belongs to you.." he said softly.

Neito looked at the box and opened it looking at the two rings, tearing up but letting a small sad chuckle "you wanna know something..." he spoke looking at the rings, remembering the day he bought them.

"I bought these the same day that we had...our last date with him...and...remember how he wanted to make me tell you guys what the surprise was.." he mumbled, trying to blink away the tears but instead the tears spilled.

"This was the surprise...Toshi...he knew...he knew something was up...h-he knew that...if I didn't t-told him that day I wouldn't have a c-chance to tell him.." he mumbled trying not to break down.

Hitoshi frowned and laid next to him looking at the rings "he knows Nei...he knows how much you love him...how much we love him...he knows that even though he isn't here with us...he'll always live in our hearts" he said kissing Neito softly.

Neito kissed back and held back a sob nodding a bit "w-why didn't he told us Toshi...if he k-knew something was off why d-didn't he said anything..." he mumbled frowning a bit.

"He wanted to leave us didn't he? He could of told us and he chose not to.." he mumbled in a sad yet angry tone.

Hitoshi hugged Neito and held him close, hoping that what what Neito was saying wasn't true, that Denki didn't knew what was coming, that he didn't chose to stay quiet knowing that he was going to die there.

He hoped that him and Neito didn't fall apart.

He hoped that he wouldn't lose Neito.

He hoped that he didn't end up alone.

But unlike last time his hopes weren't as high.

Why?

Because last time he put all his hopes on something he ended up losing someone.