The delicate man that capCURED my heart

47 : ONCE

KREIA'S POV

“I heard he’s already training under a korean company... with a group” Kent simply stated and sip on his drink.

“Good for him...”

Good for him that he’s already up to his dream. To be in a group, to be an idol. Tinuloy niya pala ang pagpunta sa management na nag approved sa online audition niya. I wonder who he was with that time? Pinangako ko kasing sasamahan ko siya roon, but things got messed up.

“So, are we gonna talk about him for the rest of the night?” I chuckled while staring at the peaceful beach in front.

“I was just updating you about his whereabouts, I know you miss him already” a bark of laughter follows after he said that.

I just rolled my eyes and sip on my last bottle. He got me there, for real. I kind of, I mean, yes I admit. Just for this night, I am missing his presence.

After that night with Kent, we became close friends already. Hanggang sa naulit at naulit ang pag-iinom namin sa harap ng dagat. We were just chilling and talking about nonsense things, nothing more or less. Just bonding as friends.

Kaya marami ang nagulat ng magpasukan na ulit, kahit sila Gav at Qwyn ay nagulantang din. Magsama ba naman ang hindi naman nagpapansinan sa klase simula noon? Well, it’s not about me this time. It’s all about Kent, kasi hindi namin siya nakikita noon pa man na may kasama. He was solo all the time, perks of being an introvert.

We entered the room together early in a monday morning. Napuno ulit nang usap-usapan hindi lang sa loob ng classroom kundi mapalabas din. Funny how people talked about Justin and I, kami pa rin pala ang laman nang bulung-bulungan nila. After that incident wherein Ysa got hurt, naging mainit ulit ako sa tingin ng ibang tao. Dagdagan pa na iba na naman ang bumubuntot sa akin ngayon.

Pero nalabas na rin naman ang totoong nangyari, na hindi ako ang may kagagawan at expelled na rin yung mga ponyeta. But people are still so mad at me. Hindi ko alam, parang mas nasaktan ko pa sila kung umasta. O dahil ba sa tingin nila nasaktan ko yung taong pinapangarap nila. Little did they know that I’m the one who’s hurting here.

“Hayaan mo sila dyan, Kreia. We won’t waste our time for them” ani Qwyn nang mailapag ang tray ng pagkain sa mesa.

As we should. Instead, we just enjoyed our meal in the cafeteria. Apat pa rin naman kami pero si Kent na yung isa.

“Look at him from afar” Kent whispered.

Kaya bigla ko na lang inilibot ang mata ko sa kung saan. When suddenly I met a dagger look on someone named, Justin. Shocked by his stare, I looked away like a scared kitten. Siniko ko agad si Kent dahil sa kadaldalan.

“He’s alone and seems... angry” dagdag pa niya ulit at tumawa ng sinamaan ko siya ng tingin.

Ganoon lagi ang eksena, palagi ko siyang nakikitang mag-isa at nagsusungit sa kalayuan. No one dared to get closer to him for his aura changed. May iilan ngang matatapang na lumalapit pero naiiyak naman agad dahil hindi ito pinapansin. Now, I got blamed again for they said that I’m the reason why Justin changed.

Hanggang sa matapos na ang last sem at magfo-fourth year na kami ay may nariring pa rin akong masasamang salita galing sa iba. Pero hanggang salita lang naman dahil alam na nila kung anong kaya kong gawin kapag kinalaban nila ako.

“Wala talagang sasama sa ‘kin na mag early enroll?” naiinis kong tanong sa tatlo dahil ayaw nila akong samahan.

“Nakakatamad pumila sa registrar, Krei. Masyado pang maaga” si Gav.

“Next month na gaga!” si Qwyn at inirapan pa ako.

“Not available, I got some important things to do” Kent said when I looked at him hoping that he’ll come with me.

“Fine! I’ll go with myself alone!”

The next morning, the line on the registrar was pretty long and I had no choice. I have to comeback later after lunch. Maglilibot na nga lang ako sa campus at magliliwaliw.

Napadpad ako sa library at nagbasa na lang ng libro. Ilang oras pa ang lumipas at naburyo rin ako kaya lumabas din ako agad. I just found myself walking upstairs going straight to the music studio. Iilan lang ang mga estudyanteng naririto, may mga nageensayo at may mga nag-o-audition pa. Nang naabot ko na ang pinakadulong room ay narinig ko ang malakas na music galing doon. Hindi kasi naisarado ng mabuti ang pinto. Pipihitin ko sana para makapasok ako pero naunahan ako ng nasa loob.

I paused a bit when I met his hazel brown eyes. Muntik na akong matumba dahil sa lakas nang paghila niya sa pinto pero mabuti na lang at mahigpit din akong nakakapit sa doorknob.

“I was about to shut the door fully close—” palusot ko pa pero naputol ang sasabihin ko nang lagpasan niya ako at bahagyang binangga ang balikat ko.

“Ano bang problema mo, ha?” galit na humabol ako sakanya patungong rooftop.

“Why are you so mad at me when I should be the one who’s angry with you!” I shouted while taking the steps.

“Stop following me” he icily said.

“Hindi! Mag-usap tayo” giit ko.

Sinundan ko siya hanggang sa nasa taas na kami. He went straight to the railings and sat under to hide from the heat. Tumayo ako sa harap niya at naghintay ng sasabihin niya.

“Get lost!” he grumpily said then closed his eyes.

My emotions were almost ready to burst because of so much rage... not for him but for myself. Galit na galit ako sa sarili ko dahil bakit ko pa naisipang sundan siya rito kung wala naman akong mapapala. What am I doing?

“You talk to me first!” I shouted again while controlling my abnormal breathing. Halos umalon na ang dibdib ko dahil sa sobrang emosyon.

“Bakit galit na galit ka pa rin sa akin hanggang ngayon? The engagement party is already off!” pinalis ko ang luhang tumakas. “Napatunayan na rin na hindi ako ang gumawa noon sa pinakamamahal mong si Ysa!” with mentioning her name, he opened his eyes and looked at me.

“Why are you all so mad at me?! Bakit naging kasalanan ko na ang lahat pati ang pagbabago ng pakikitungo mo sa mga tao? Bakit parang ako yung nang-agrabyado ng tao kung makapagsalita sila ng masasama sa akin?” I was really trying to be strong and stifle my sobs while saying that.

“Galit na galit ako sa sarili ko Justin! Galit na galit ako dahil gusto ko ring magalit sayo pero putangina! Hindi ko magawa!” I broke down in front of him and he was just staring blankly at me.

Stupid me, why did I get along with my emotions? When he didn’t really care at all!

“I was also trying to save myself... to prove that I’m not that person you all think of me!” I took a deep breath before letting go my sobs. “I was hoping for you to save me just once...”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~