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MY BODY goes into overdrive as I snort the white powder lined up on my journal, my left nostril being held shut as I close my eyes. Taking a deep breath, I throw my head back as the remaining drug drips down into my throat. Sniffing once again, I make sure to rid my nostril of the excess Xanax, using my knuckle to wipe my nose.
I can feel my heartbeat quicken and my blood run cold as the drug flows through my body, making all my senses go into overdrive. The air seems more clear, the sun flowing through my window more warm, the air colder.
I don't want to do drugs, but I can't let go of the feeling I get every single time I take a bump of that crushed up pill. It's like all the problems I have in life, they fade away into the air and I don't think about them for those short thirty minutes I feel like I'm on top of the world.
It's such a euphoric feeling, all the weight that was pressing down on you, suddenly gone. The only thing in your mind is how you feel, the way that you're enjoying the numbness. I never intended to get addicted, but shit happens.
Three knocks sound on my door, my heart jumping as I blow the powder away on the journal, jumping off my bed and sticking the journal away under my mattress. Running my hands through my hair, I take a deep breath as my heart slows down and walk over to the white door; opening it.
"Hey. Fez and Ash are here." Alex tells me, handing me a glass of water as I hesitantly reach out, grabbing it. My hand slips just a bit, and the glass is falling out of my hand and shattering onto the floor.
"Fuck!" I exclaim as glass stabs into my foot, my blood instantly pooling onto the hardwood. My eyes widen as I see it, my mind going back to two months ago. Flashes of the shoot out run through my mind, my chest heaving as my body riddled with fear.
"I'm sorry! Please, please don't shoot!" She pleads out, pointing to the gun that was sat in the bathtub. One of the officers instantly pick up the gun, looking at her quickly.
Breathing heavily, she waits until they're distracted to pull the pistol out of the back of her waistband, clicking the safety off and aiming at the officers shoulder. A loud gunshot rings in the air as the officer falls back, a loud thud hitting the ground.
"Leilani!" Alex cries, hot tears streaming down his face as he makes eye contact with his sister. Her eyes instantly go to the cop in the middle of the hallway who was slowly moving his gun up, the red dot now trained on her chest.
"Please. I'm sorry." She sobs, shaking her head and dropping the gun, kicking it to the officer. The officer shakes his head, moving the dot up to her forehead, pausing for a second.
"Leilani!" Ash cries out, looking at the girl as she cries, her chest heaving and eyes narrowed as she looks at Ash and Fez. Her eyes move to Alex, mouthing a small 'I love you"
