the kissing project :: lrh

"--you're not saying it to harley, you're saying it to juliet,"

i wandered about the halls, dreading rehearsals. any other time, days dragged on and on, but for some reason that god only knew about, the days went by in what seemed like minutes.

i paced back and forth in front of the auditorium's door, procrastinating on going in. maybe if i paced long enough, i'd create a hole in the ground, and it'd swallow me. anything was better than rehearsing for this stupid ass play.

"if you continue to pace like that you're gonna pace a hole to china," the voice of a rat named luke said.

"that's what i'm going for." i replied, bluntly.

"you know, girls would kill to be in your place, harley. being my juliet. you should consider yourself lucky." his pretentious voice spoke.

i rolled my eyes, "you're such an arrogant dickhead, luke."

"and you're a heinous bitch, but i'm not so stuck up as to not overlook it for five seconds. i don't wanna do this play, either, but neither of us are getting out of it," he said, and i sighed, knowing he was right.

"see! you know i'm right." he screeched.

"well, you're not wrong, you're just an asshole." i muttered, opening the auditorium doors, and walking toward the stage.

"class!" mr. el exclaimed happily, though everyone in the room looked like they'd rather shoot themselves than be there.

"this is our first rehearsal, aren't you all excited?" he asked, and we all just glared at each other with helpless looks.

he sighed, "well, like it or not, you're all a part of this play. if you didn't want to do it - you shouldn't have auditioned,"

"can we just get this stupid rehearsal over with? the sooner this is over, the sooner i can go home and read comic books." i said, receiving a laugh from luke.

"you read comic books? i thought you starred in them, harley quinn." luke chuckled, only making me want to rip his perfectly quiffed hair right out of his head.

"so fucking original, luke. i've never been called harley quinn before!" i said, sarcastically.

"if you two are done with the jibber jabber, i'd like to actually start with this rehearsal." mr. el said, annoyed. "act one, scene five, page five, go,"

i had read romeo and juliet many, many times. i loved it, i thought it was beautiful. i just didn't love it when luke was romeo, and i was juliet.

i was pretty confident i didn't need to look at my lines, but i still did.

luke looked down at the paper he held with the lines on it, and a perfect smirk formed on his face.

he grabbed my hand, just like he was supposed to, and i held back my puke as he began to speak. "your hand is like a holy place that my hand is unworthy to visit-"

"woah, woah, woah. why are we starting with the scene where they kiss?" i questioned.

"because it's the first time romeo amd juliet meet." mr. el explained. (((is that right idk)))

"well, yeah, but what about all the stuff before that? y'know, like-"

"quiet, young specimen. just do the scene, and make it snappy," he said, cutting me off. "continue."

"your hand is like a holy place that my hand is unworthy to visit," luke bursted into laughter before he could finish his sentence.

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry, but it's not me who's unworthy of harley's hand, it's harley who's unworthy of my hand." luke said, both me and mr. el rolling our eyes.

"luke, it's not about you and harley, it's about romeo and juliet. it's a play, you're not saying it to harley - you're saying it to juliet. so if you could do this thing called acting, that'd be magnificent." mr. el said, and luke actually looked legitimately embarrassed. "continue. again."

he reattached our hands for the secomd time, "your hand is like a holy place that my hand is unworthy to visit. if you're offended by the touch of my hand, my two lips are standing here like blushing pilgrims, ready to make things better with a kiss," luke said, reading off of his line sheet.

"good pilgrim, you don't give your hand enough credit. by holding my hand you show polite devotion. after all, pilgrims touch the hands of statues of saints. holding one palm against another is like a kiss," i said, not bothering to look at the lines.

"don't saints and pilgrims have lips too?"

"yes, pilgrim, they have lips that they're supposed to pray with." i said, trying not to laugh at how hard luke was struggling with not making a 'witty' comment, or bursting into laughter.

"well then, saint, let lips do what hands do. i'm praying for you to kiss me. please grant my prayer so my faith doesn't turn to despair," luke said, both his face and voice showing displeasure, but so did mine probably.

"saints don't move, even when they grant prayers." i said, my stomach doing flips knowing what happened after his next line.

the kiss.

"then don't move while i act out my prayer," he said, beginning to move toward me.

i backed away slowly, then crouched down to grab my bag off the floor. "i don't know about you all, but i think i've had enough rehearsal for my whole life. so i'm just gonna go. yeah, um, okay, bye," i rambled, speed walking off stage.

"harley," mr. el called, sighing. "you don't have to kiss luke. not today, at least. you will eventually, but i guess i'll make an exception for now."

i groaned, turning around to walk back to the stage.

luke leaned scarily close to me, and began to whisper. "afraid you might feel sparks, quinn?"

"no, i'm afraid of tasting the last girl you've fucked, hemmings."

-

harley is my queen and i strive to be like her

so i haven't updated this in 5ever, i'm so sorry bUT I SHOULD BE UPDATING MORE !! it really depends on what my irl schedual is like yanno

and i hope some of the romeo and juliet stuff is right bc like i've only read random parts so i had to google it and read the romeo and juliet parts. so i hope it's ok bc we all know the internet is a big fat liaR

pls don't me look dumb google pls

aNYWAYS. vote, comment & all that stuff pleasepleaseplease it only takes a few seconds and helps me know you all are actually eNJOYING MY SHITTY FIC

follow me too yeah that'd be kool

dedi to nearlynirvana bc she's a qt

ok pce out