She's Going to Be the Death of Me

Chapter Fourteen

My family and I stayed at the safe house for a couple more days before Giorgio and I decided that it was safe again. The time without Drew being in the house helped me focus. If she didn't want to be with me, then so be it. I was going to focus on the canal and securing my legacy.

As much as I wanted to be done with Drew, I didn't want to see her hurt, so I kept her protected. I tried not to "stalk" her, so I didn't follow her around personally, but I was keeping regular tabs on her.

After a few months, I received word that she was planning to move. Out of the city. Out of the state. To Miami, Florida. It would be much harder to keep tabs on her from all the way up here because I didn't need my men to be spread too far apart. But I also knew that I couldn't stop her.

I felt sick to my stomach and long winded. I hated this feeling, but I knew if I let her go, then I wouldn't have to feel like this again. There would be no more protecting her or keeping tabs. If she dated someone, then I wouldn't know. I was cutting myself off. I called the private investigator and instructed him to close her case once she left the state. I called Deacon to tell him that I didn't need her followed anymore.

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I hardly ever answered unknown numbers, but I took a chance for whatever reason.

Hearing her say my name had me on my feet. This couldn't be her. Did I start confusing Giselle's voice for Drew's? Her confirming that I was, in fact, not going crazy did nothing for my weak heart.

And the impossible happened: she wanted to meet somewhere...to talk. Her tone sounded off. Not just hesitant but strained. The conversation was not normal. Aside from the fact that she was calling me out of the blue to meet up, something else just wasn't right.

"What's wrong?" I asked

"Nothing. Everything's fine."

Something was definitely wrong and for some reason, she couldn't tell me over the phone. I listened closely to her instructions and immediately called my brother.

He suggested that we scope out the meeting place with a few men to see if Drew truly wanted to meet or if it was a setup.

Sure enough when we arrived at the coffee shop on Renner Street, we could see O'Malley and a few of his men surrounding the place in preparation of my arrival. We remained hidden and watched for an hour and a half before O'Malley stormed off. It was clear that I was not coming, but now I was worried for Drew.

I instructed a team to follow O'Malley and his men to wherever and to obtain as much information on Drew's status.

"You don't want to go with them, fratello?" Giorgio asked

"I think it's best if I handle this from a distance. But would you lead the team? I trust you more than I trust myself."

"Baby brother is growing up." Giorgio smirked,
"Of course I will."
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It pained me as I paced back and forth wondering if Drew would be alright; if Giorgio would get to her in time. I could've avoided this feeling by going myself, but I wouldn't have been able to think, which would've gotten Drew or myself killed.

Giorgio knew that to do, he had taught me everything I knew and for that, I should trust him.

I needed to focus on what I would say to her. She left me that day and planned to leave farther away. Had it not been for her run in with O'Malley, then she probably wouldn't have called. Knowing that she didn't feel the same way about me.... I needed to hear it from her. I needed to be crushed properly this time. I must've enjoyed the torture... or at least enjoyed her. If she could tell me to my face that we didn't have a chance, that it was pointless to keep pining after her, then maybe I could leave her be.

I hoped that she could see that I was genuine; that I needed her more than oxygen. I gave away the canal because my heart hurt so much. I hope that would show her how much she means to me, how much this relationship would mean to me. I realized I had been going about this all wrong. I had my mind set on conquering Drew, but it took so long for me to see that she wasn't an object that could be bought or possessed. I understand now.

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After seeing her shot and bruised the way she was, my heart sunk to the pit of my stomach. The reality of how my lifestyle affected her was staring me in the face. It would be hard to protect her 100% of the time, but I knew she had better chances if she would stop fighting me.

I keep blaming her, but I know that it's me. Maybe it's the both of us. Her stubbornness plus trust issues and my controlling personality. We would never get anywhere if we didn't step out of our own way.

Listening to her try to convince herself why we shouldn't be together hurt, but I also knew that she was doing it because she knew that there was something still there. Confessing to her my feelings and telling her how I abandoned the canal for my love for her actually worked. I just needed her to see that I was true. That I love her, that I am in love with her.

We would have our problems, I'm sure of it, but I will do my best to keep her happy. As rocky as this relationship was and will be, the only person I wanted to be with was her, even if that meant being on and off forever. Whatever would be necessary to keep her in my life, to marry her, to share children with her, I would do it without hesitation.

She may not know it now, but I am forever hers and there is no amount of kicking and screaming that will change that.