Fearless ✔️

Chapter 16

Laying on the ground with two toddlers climbing over me. I kept my eyes closed and enjoyed the sounds they made their little gurgles and giggles. It was all ruined as someone knocked on the door. Zackery jumped since it scared him and he started to cry which led to Marie crying.

I sighed and helped them off of me before sitting up. Both parents running into the living room. Brendon goes to the door as Minnie and I attempt to calm they babies.

"Hello Morgan? What can I do for you?" The name made my ears perk up as I look towards the door. "Here for a check in- making sure everything is running smoothly. Mind if I come in?" His voice gave it away quickly.

"Oh of course" Brendon responds opening the door some more for him. I had somehow gotten Zack in my lap as he blinked away his tears clinging to my shirt for dear life.

Marie was laying on her mama's shoulder also wiping her own tears. I made eye contact with Morgan and he quickly looked me over before looking back to Brendon. "Mind if I have a few private words with the boy?" He looks between the two. The boy?

"That's up to him" Minnie speaks up. I was quite happy with her answer. I stopped my mouth from moving without thinking and thought it through. I wanted to tell him to leave me the fuck alone. We aren't going to do this whole pathetic father-son relationship where he comes by once a month.

"What do you say Dean?" He asked cocking his head to the side. "Sure" I mutter rubbing Zackery's back. The baby didn't want to leave me and it kinda made me a little sad that I had to leave him.

I promised to come back and he finally calmed down as Morgan and I walked to the living room. He sat and I sat across waiting for him to talk. He can obviously tell things are okay- just leave.

"How have you been?" He starts with his stupid questions. "You could have texted me that" I answer crossing my arms. "You're right" he sighs as I wait for him to continue.

"Has anybody texted you?" He gets to what he really wants. "Hmmm let me see. Minnie, Brendon, Lloyd, Jules, Taylor, Leo-" "okay- okay I get it stupid question" he grumbles and I nod.

"No weird text though right?" He asks. I just nod again. "That's good- tell me or somebody if somebody weird texts you" he adds giving me no details what so ever.

"Why- you're being weird" I grumble making him sigh once again. "Some things are happening and I want you to be safe" he whispers putting an arm around me.

"Are they scary?" I ask with a laugh and he chuckles. "Only to lame people" he whispers. I nod with a smile. "Are you okay?" I ask hoping he won't leave if we continue to talk.

"Busy- tired. I'm not as free as I use to be" he rubs his eyes as I watch him curiously. "Just promise me you'll be careful" he stands up ruining my plan like the asshole he is.

"Where are you going?" I ask a stupid question as he fixes his coat. "Back to the agency we have some stuff to sort through" he mumbles brushing off his sleeves.

"Aren't you going to ask me questions? Check for bruises? Make sure I'm doing well in school and stuff?" I ask a little hurt. "No you seem fine if you're not you can text me" he pats my head. My face saddens and as soon as I feel the need to cry I snap.

The sadness disappears and I stare at him with the same neutral face. "Have a good rest of your day" I say standing and moving towards my temporary room. "Damn it- Dean don't shut them off- it's okay to be upset" he mumbles as if I had a choice.

I didn't feel sad though so that's good. I just shrugged and walked to my room. "Dean!" He yells but I decided to ignore it. Shutting my door I flip onto my bed and go onto my phone.

There's a knock on my door and I ignore it. "Dean? Can I come in?" Minnie's voice wavers from behind the door. She's scared? Of what? Me? What a pity.

"Yes" I answer continuing to go through my phone. I listen to her set a child down. I could tell by the shuffling noise that they had scrambled away. The door opens and she timidly stands in the doorway.

"Are you okay?" She asked looking me over. She had a face of worry. Her eyes just barely looking over her glasses until she pushed them up. "Of course" I answer simply.

"Are you sure?" She asks again and I set my phone down looking over at her. "I obviously am fine does it look like somethings wrong with me? Is there something wrong with me? Why don't you tell me?" I ask a hint of anger coming out.

I don't feel sad at all though and that's what made me angrier. I wanted to be sad. I wanted her to yell at me and scream as I backed away scared, but I felt none of that.

"Of course not- I just worry about you. I don't want you to be sad" she mumbles. I roll my eyes at this and sit up. "Do I look sad?" I ask simply and she looks up looking me over.

"No..." she trails off and I cock my head to the side. "So what's the probelm?" I ask through a toothy smile. "Don't you want to be sad- he hurt you- in a way" she fumbled with her fingers as I feel my body fail me. Everything stopped but I immediately hid it again.

She was right of course. "It's fine, my body seems to know what's best for me" I explain and she nods. There's some more shuffling as two curly blonde haired kids peak through her legs.

"Hey guys go back and play" she whispers as I watch them curiously. Zack takes a hand from his mouth and points at me as their mom's face furrows into one of fear.

She's scared to let them near me. That's when it broke. I scared her. My emotions snapped to quickly. Usually I have to force them back after days but today I lasted twenty minutes.

I started to cry and she shot her head up to look at me. Turning back onto the bed I shoved my head into my hands and sobbed. I didn't want to scare her. I would never hurt them.

"Dean, hey buddy what's wrong!?" Brendon's voice broke through as I looked up to watch him push through Minnie who stood there with her mouth open and tears in her eyes.

I was ruining it all! I don't know how to fix it! I can't! He sat on the bed next to me and pulled me into a hug. I didn't react, but my crying became silent as I tried to comprehend if I was alright. 

I couldn't decide and just sat there my head on his shoulder as he played with my hair. "Morgan is gone if that means anything?" He whispered. I just continued to cry not knowing what I wanted.

I think I wanted somebody to punch me. I wanted to be hurt. I wanted to be scared. Scared for my life. The fear I craved. The urgency to be normal. I couldn't say any of this out loud though. They'd think I'm crazy. I am crazy.

There's crying and I thought it was me until I finally snapped out of it to see the twins bouncing and holding onto their mother. They cried and cried as I watched them desperately wanting to make them feel better.

"Minnie?" Brendon called and she nodded ushering the babies forward. Marie fell to her hands and knees her face red and tear stricken as Zackery clumsily crawled over.

He was pulled onto my bed by Brendon and I watched curiously my own tears silently falling down my face. Now they were just there. I couldn't control them. I might be crying for hours with no control over it. "Let's go Marie, come on sweetie" Minnie helps her up and they walk each other over to the bed.

Brendon turns Zack around and he crawls over his chubby little arms reaching for me. I carefully pull him to my chest and not long after Marie is jumping onto my chest as well.

The two hiccup on top of me and I lay down rubbing their backs. I knew their parents were watching but I didn't care. I was tired and irritated and crying didn't help.

"I'm going to go make dinner, you take good care of them" Brendon hums moving my hair out of my face. I nodded my answer as Minnie makes herself noticeable.

"You're such a good older brother don't let anybody else tell you otherwise"

When and what do you think the next cameo will be? Who will be in it? From my former book Benchwarmer.