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Jeanie Miller- that was her name.
And she was nine years old, as of today January 19, 2018.
Maria held the Polaroid picture between her trembling fingers.
Five years. Five years, this picture had been jammed shut inside of the front zipper pouch of that backpack Jeanie was clutching for dear life when they found her alone in that library.
Robin ran her hand over her friend's back. "Are you gonna tell her? She deserves to see it, y'know?"
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Maria made her way to the kitchen before stopping, smelling a rich, espresso smell she thought she'd long forgotten.
Coffee.
Ross stood by the kitchen's window. A coffee pot in his hand. "Found a bag of beans and a pot in the cabinet. Washed them up. 'T's pretty good, actually." he whispered.
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"Louisa and I... we had a thing going on for a while. Knew you wouldn't go for it so we kept it hush."
The blonde watched Ross from her heads bowed position. "Was it going on when..."
Ross didn't answer, but Maria knew the answer. She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Ross, I-"
"No. Don't." He turned away, setting the mug in the sink. "You hated her."
"No, I di-"
"Y'know, she really did try to make you happy. God, she tried."
Maria sighed and held her arms out after setting her mug down. "Well, I don't know what you want me to say, Ross."
"I'm sorry? Is that what you want to hear? Because, trust me, I don't think I can say it enough." Maria dropped her arms.
"I'm sorry, okay? I really am. You want me to admit that it was all my fault- that it's all on me? I know it is, Ross. Had I never rerouted us to following the Fireflies, our friends, our family, my parents, Louisa, none of them would be dead, and I know it's all my fault... I do." Maria pleaded him with her eyes to understand her tortured mind.
"You want me to tell you that I will never forget it? Okay, because the guilt, the dread, it will not leave my thoughts. You wanna make sure that it'll follow me around and torment me for the rest of the time that I'm in my right state of mind? Because it will." Maria finished with tears shining in her eyes.
She stepped close to Ross, placing her right hand on his shoulder. "But trust me when I tell you- nothing I say... or do, will ever... ever... bring them back." They stared into each other's eyes. "They are gone... Ross," she whispered.
