The Patron Saint of Monsters

Chapter Six Part One

“So how do we get rid of Trent?” Trina whispered.

“I don’t know Velma. How?” Oleander responded while picking out clothes from her closet for her friends to help her examine. She wanted the perfect outfit for her date, she was making Valerie sit in the parlour with Trent, to make sure that he stayed put and didn’t disrupt things.

“Ole. You texted me yesterday saying that you knew how. Are you fucking kidding me?” Trina snapped.

“She meant she knew how to get rid of Trina.” Rebecca sneered.

“No I didn’t.” Oleander said, “I had a theory last night about it because of something Trent had told me. I had forgotten sorry.”

“What is it?” Trina asked.

“I think we just have to believe that we can do it. Like Rebecca legit thinks we’re witches, so if we all felt that way we could maybe do it. But I don’t really know for sure. I don’t even know if I want to get rid of Trent yet. I don’t want to even think about fucking around with the goddamned dark arts.” Oleander exasperated.

Rebecca just snorted a laugh and Trina sat on Oleander’s bed.

“Valerie!” Oleander shouted out.

Trent and Valerie ran up the stairs, “Are you in danger?” Trent said.

“Not unless fashion emergencies count.” Oleander answered.

Valerie sat next to her two friends on the bed and catcalled “Model for us baby!” before breaking into a wolf whistle.

“Out.” Rebecca demanded to Trent with a point to the door.

“What if he just invisibles out and returns.” Trina asked meekly.

“Good point Cook,” Rebecca said slapping her on the back, “Why don’t you babysit him this time?”

Trina sighed and meekly followed Trent out of the bedroom.

“Your sister is a bitch.” Trent proclaimed from his seat on the couch.

“Yeah.” Trina agreed while fiddling with the television remote.

“So what do you think of Ian?” He questioned, aiming for casually but missing.

“He’s alright, a total stoner.” Trina answered, “Do you think the whole Ian thing is weird?”

“Yes. Oleander could do far better.” Trent said.

“No, I mean because he looks like you but with blonde hair.” Trina clarified.

“No, he doesn’t.” Trent insisted, but he couldn’t help grinning. He wouldn’t mind looking like a complete wanker if it meant that Oleander found him attractive.

“Yes, he does.” Trina argued, “You’re cuter though.”

“Thanks.” Trent replied.

Oleander and her friends decided that she would wear a fairly deep V neck sweater and her martian jeans “They made her ass look out of this world.” Oleander was also going to wear her most flattering bra and her hair in a messy bun at the top of her head. She was going for the smartly sexy look, they figured that if she looked smart on her date tonight it would cancel out the stoned make out session from the previous night. They didn’t want to completely veto the progress Oleander had made, but they did want to showcase what girlfriend material she was.

“I think Trent is going to follow me.” Oleander sighed.

“I don’t think he can help it Ole,” Valerie said in his defense, “he was white knuckling the couch arm rest the entire time we were down there. He was trying his hardest. It’s like it physically hurt him. Just let him be invisible.”

“I just want everything to be perfect and I want this to be the type of night that I have spent the last umteen years reading about and picturing. I just, I didn’t want to be the girl with the monster under her bed before and now I don’t want to be the girl with the ghost stalker.”

“You don’t have to be those things Ole. Tonight just be the girl going to a movie with the guy she’s been lusting over for three years.” Valerie said in her soothing voice.

“Well, you’re always going to be those things, just pretend you aren’t.” Rebecca interjected.

“Way to not help.” Valerie chastised.

“It’s fine, she’s right. I need to figure out what I want to do about Trent. Tonight can be a test, among other things.” Oleander replied decisively.

“Want us to stay and help with your hair and makeup or should we just leave now?” Valerie asked cheerfully,

“What? I thought we were staying until you got home? I’m staying, there’s booze that needs drinking.” Rebecca said with her arms crossed.

Oleander rolled her eyes and said towards Valerie “Do you mind staying? You guys can go ahead and throw that kickback. After the date maybe Ian will join us. Don’t have too many people over, keep the special things in the basement and we can just ask Trent to do the make all the  trash float into the rubbish bin.”

Rebecca rolled her eyes, “You’re doing that thing again.” she declared.

“What thing?” Oleander asked innocently.

“That thing where you combine British words and American ones.” Rebecca clarified.

“It’s all the tea she drinks.” Valerie declared.

“It’s probably because my parents act English.” Oleander said with a sigh, “I’ve got to stop doing it.”

“There are worse things than being like you’re parents, Ole.” Valerie said glaring at Rebecca for making Oleander suddenly self-conscious.

“Being the girl with the ghost stalker is way worse in fact!” Rebecca blurted out.

“Still not helping.” Valerie whispered harshly.