Beyond Education [Jemily]

What To Expect

"I'm late."

I felt my face lose all its color, "Late? L-Like you mean...?"

"Yeah." I pulled my desk chair out and sat down, thinking thoughts.

"What do you um... When did you... You're sure?"

"I'm sure I'm late. I've been so overworked with midterms coming up that I didn't realize but..."

"But what?"

"I started feeling nauseous this morning and really tired... Headache. Penelope asked if maybe it was my cycle but then it clicked that I missed my period."

"Do you... Do you think? You know..."

JJ sighed, "There's a chance, Em."

"Well how about I take you to the infirmary? They have free tests there."

JJ nodded, "Okay." I put a pair of shoes on, grabbed my keys, and then walked across campus to the university health center with JJ. We approached the nurse's desk and JJ quietly explained, "Hi um, I-I'm here to see if I could get a pregnancy test?"

The nurse looked up at her and kindly said, "Sure thing, honey, I'll call someone up to bring you back." JJ and I took a seat in the waiting area, her hand tightly clasped in mine.

She looked up at me and nervously asked, "What are we gonna do, Emily? If it's... you know?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. But I'm here for you, Jayje. No matter what. Always." I kissed her on the forehead and she nuzzled her head into my neck, feeling a little more comforted but still understandably anxious. A nurse called us back to an exam room shortly and handed JJ a pregnancy test. She stepped into the attached bathroom and prepped it before coming back out and handing it to the nurse. I stood next to her at the exam table as she nervously bounced her legs, waiting for the results.

After about 5 minutes the nurse turned back around and held up the test, "It's positive, ladies." JJ immediately put her head in her hands and started crying. The nurse sighed in sympathy and quietly asked me, "Do you two want a minute alone?"

I nodded while rubbing JJ's back, "Please."

JJ picked her head up and looked at me with a teary, worried face, "What are we gonna do, Em?"

"I don't know, JJ. We uh, we'll have to have a serious talk about this. You um... You know what the three options are right? Keeping the baby, putting it up for adoption, and abort—"

"I don't wanna have an abortion, Emily."

"O-Okay. You're sure? There's nothing wrong with that at all, JJ, it's completely your choice."

"You want me to have an abortion? Is that what you're saying?"

I sighed, "No, that's not what I—," I took a deep breath, "Look, why don't we have the nurse come back in and talk to us for a little bit and then we can head back to my room and talk. Just us." JJ nodded, so I opened up the door and called the nurse back inside. She gave us a few pamphlets about adoption, abortion, and teen parenting, since technically that's what we'd be doing if we decided to keep the baby. To be honest, I'd be comfortable with any of those choices. It's really up to JJ. I'd do whatever I could to support her no matter what she decides. We took a campus shuttle back to the main part of Yale from the infirmary, and headed up to my dorm. Tara was out, so JJ and I could have complete privacy for a while. We each kicked our shoes off and headed into the den area, plopping on the couch. JJ sat criss-crossed and anxiously held a throw pillow in her lap.

She quietly said to me, "I'm scared, Emmy."

I looked into her eyes and calmed her, "I know, babe. I promise you we will figure this out, together. And no matter what you decide I'm gonna support you."

"No matter what?"

"Always. Even though it took both of us for this to happen, it's your body that's ultimately going to be going through the hardships. You should decide for yourself what you think will be best."

JJ scooted closer and smiled as she took my hand, "Baby, that's really sweet of you and I'm glad you're so supportive but... this is still your baby as much as it's mine. And I want us to decide together what to do... But..."

"But what, Jayje?"

"I'm worried we just won't be able to do... what I'm thinking of doing." She chewed her lip nervously and looked at me with concern.

I nodded in understanding and asked, "You want to keep it, don't you?"

She sighed and confided, "I do, Em."

I chuckled lightly, "Well then that's what we'll do, love."

"R-Really? Just like that you're... you're saying yes? But it's gonna be hard and we both have school and between your football and my soccer wh-when are we gonna be able to—"

"Shhh shhh, JJ. Come on now, don't worry about that stuff. You and I were both thinking of living off campus next year anyway, so we'll just get a house instead of an apartment like we were thinking. We can still live close by and have an easy commute, and I can find a full-time nanny for us to hire during the day. Besides, Yale has an on-campus daycare for professors and students who have kids."

"They do?"

"Yeah, I pass it on my way to the field every day."

"Huh. I didn't know that." She seemed a little more collected at that but then the panic started to set in more, "But, Emmy, buying a house and hiring a nanny... isn't that really expensive? Especially with all the doctor visits and prenatal care we're gonna need?"

"Jenny, I don't want you to worry about that. I'm gonna take care of everything. I can even track my mom down to help us if we need her. If you think I've got money then you should see her bank account."

JJ put her head down, "I feel bad though." She started to sniffle and tear up again.

I pulled her against my chest and hugged her close, "Hey, hey now. Don't cry, baby. Why do you feel bad, JJ?"

"B-Because!"

I laughed, "That's not a conclusive answer."

"I don't want you to spend all that money on me... and all that time. You're so good to me and I... I got us into this! And now our lives are gonna be so diff-er-e-e-e-ntttt!" She sobbed into my shirt collar.

"JJ, baby, come on. You're talking silly. I love you more than I love myself and I love taking care of you. I'd drop out of college and give up my inheritance and sell a vital organ to make sure you were happy and healthy. And, yes, our lives are gonna be different now, but babe," I sat her up and brushed some hair out of her face, "Our lives are gonna change for the better. We're gonna love this baby so much and they're gonna be so well taken care of. I'll make damn sure of it. This isn't a setback or an obstacle, it's a new, incredible chapter in our lives together."

JJ smiled, and for a second I thought she was all calmed down, but then, "This is what I meannnnn! I lo-love you so mu-u-u-u-u-uchhhh!" I playfully rolled my eyes as she collapsed into my arms again. My hands drifted up and down her back as I gently whispered comforts in her ear. Once she was done, she stayed curled in my arms with a soft smile on her face. We talked about where we might wanna get a house and what gender we want the baby to be and so on and so on.

Only a few minutes later did I hear the door unlock followed by Tara's voice, "Emily? You here?"

I called back, "Den!"

She walked in and immediately looked confused, "Uh. Hey, JJ. What's goin on, you two? Em, why is your shirt wet? Why are there tissues everywhere? This place looks like it was sob-fest central."

I looked at JJ and waited for her to nod before looking back at Tara, "We're having a baby!"