"Shooting glances on me?".
Muntik na akong masamid sa iniinom ng bigla niya akong tingnan ng masama, habang nakataas ang isang kilay. Nilapag niya saglit ang I-pad na hawak niya sa coffee table before he cross his arms on his chest. He leaned his back on the couch, darted his eye's deeper on me.
"You want something to eat?", I felt so nervous while asking him what he likes to eat. The nerve, ni hindi man lang ako kinakausap. He was too focus playing on his I-pad, ang awkward tuloy."I can cook for you, just tell me want you want".
I automatically shutted my mouth when he glared at me, masama ang tingin. Kinagat 'ko ang ibabang labi 'ko bago huminga ng malalim. Hindi ko alam 'kung paano 'ko siya kakausapin, he told me earlier that he don't want to talk to me and I should better keep my mouth shut or else he will get mad at me.
"I don't want to eat", mariin niyang sabi sa akin bago tumayo sa couch, naiangat ko agad ang tingin 'ko sa kanya ng ituro niya ako."Why are you still here, can't you walk out of our unit? Do I still need to call security".
"I can't leave you, your mommy left you with me, so I have to take care of you and watch over you", sabi ko sa kanya dahilan para nakanguso siyang naupo sa couch at hindi ako pinansin."Can you talk to me, I just want to know what you don't like and what you are interested in so we can be close".
"Us be close with eachother?", he raised his left brow."You wish, it's not easy to know me, there are many challenges, challenges that are dangerous and I'm sure you won't pass it".
"I just want to be a part of your life, Keib. I want to fill all my absences and deficiency while you were growing up", seryosong sabi 'ko sa kanya. I want to touch him and hug him so tight, pero hindi ko kaya dahil siya na mismo ang lumalayo sa akin."I want to be a father to you".
"My mommy is here, and I can take care of myself alone", simpleng sabi niya sa akin."You can leave me now, again".
"Don't you still accept that I am your father, why don't you want me, Keib? ", kunot noo 'kong tanong sa kanya, naguguluhan."I want to be part of your life, I want to be with you while you were growing up".
"Pardon you Mister", sabi niya sa akin."You wanted to be part of my life without apologizing to me? How rude you are? ".
Natigilan ako bigla sa sinabi niya. Kumawang ng bahagya ang labi 'ko sa gulat, pero agad din akong tumayo at lumuhod sa harapan niya. Ilang beses na akong nag-sorry sa kanya but he keep on ignoring me, but I can't blame him. I deserve this.
I gently hold his hands, before caressing his cheeks using my thumbs. I immediately hugged him tightly while caressing the back of his head. I keep on saying sorry over and over again. He didn't response but also he didn't hug me back. Hinayaan niya lang ako.
"I'm sorry, anak", sabi 'ko pero tinitigan niya lang ako."I'm sorry, Keib. I under if you still don't want me. I'll wait for the right time for you to accept me and move on".
I held both of his shoulders before I gave him a smile and squeezed both of his cheeks. Ginulo ko pa ang buhok niya bago ako tumayo. I was about to leave when he suddenly spoke up.
"You will leave me like that? Again?", natigilan ako sa paghakbang when I heard his sad voice. Gulat pa ako pero agad 'ko din siyang nilingon."You always want to run from your responsibilities, don't you?".
"Ofcourse not", sabi ko habang nakatingin sa kanya. Nakayuko siya at mukhang dismayado sa akin. Bagsak ang dalawang balikat niya pati na ang ulo niya habang nakatayo at nakatingin sa akin. Agad akong lumapit sa kanya at hinawakan ang mukha niya."Keib, if you give me a chance to be your father, if you accept me I swear. I won't run from my responsibilities. You will always be my priority, mahal na mahal ka ni Daddy anak 'ko".
