A (not so) Normal Life of Best Friends

Chapter 37: Musical Therapy

Scout Beckett

While I like to research a lot, I also like to listen to music while I do it. Songs that talk about any type of topic that I'm into. I like certain types of rap, especially ones that talk about life. They really help me focus and bring me to reality with what I'm doing, plus it's easy for me to find out the message of the song. It's really amazing what bands and solo artists can come up with, it really is. Especially ones that talk about depression, those are ones I can relate to. Either the song or the singer(s), I can relate to them. I guess it's just my way of coping with life throwing all it's got at me, besides Alex hugging me whenever possible. I heard Will is practicing with brass instruments, so maybe I can find him sometime soon. I've looked through our group and I've written down who can play what instruments. Phoenix is good at Piano, Kyrie is good with Drums, and I'm kinda good at Guitar and other string instruments. The others still won't let me live down the time they came over and saw me playing guitar. They say I'm amazing, but I just think it sounds mediocre. While Phoenix and Kyrie have instruments that don't exactly match their personalities, though I don't judge them, Alex and Evelyn play ones that are actually closer to their personalities. Alex is good with woodwind instruments, while Evelyn can play Violin like a champ, though he can play guitar like me too. We could probably make a pretty good band now that I think about it, but I'd probably pass out from stage fright. I don't know if any of us can sing, either. Not that I've ever heard them sing before, but I don't like my singing voice, I think it sounds weird. It's not that I don't do it in private, I just don't like to do it when people are around, especially my friends. They always cheer me on and tell me it's awesome, but I just never feel confident that it is. My height is another thing that bothers me about playing music around people. I'm the shortest of the group so if anybody wanted to see me, I would have to be in front, and I hate being in front of crowds. Out of the string instruments I've played, there are some from different countries like Japan, like a biwa. The only people I can play in front of is my family, that's as confident as I can go. People may see me as an amazing talented person, but I just can't see it. I know I'm smart and adorable to some people, but I just feel like a punching bag and puny to others. Phoenix did make a deal with me that if Kyrie could boost her confidence back up, we could probably all try a music session together as a band, sort of. Maybe it'll help with my confidence too.