"So, you smoke now?" Louis asked, but it came out more as a statement much rather than a question. Harry didn't turn around right away, instead he twirled his lit cigarette between his fingers and continued to look at himself in the bathroom mirror, ignoring the hard stare from the guy he had been dreading to see for months. He pretended that he wasn't staring down Louis in the dirty mirror, but he took in how both familiar and unfamiliar the small boy was, so he had to refrain himself from turning around and letting his hands roam Louis' body just to make sure that this was all real. "What happened to all that talk of cancer and such?"
Harry tried not to smile, but a dimple became prominent on his left cheek as the corners of his mouth lifted. "Not that scared of it anymore."
There was silence for about a minute before they heard a toilet flush obnoxiously, a short boy stumbling out of the stall with red cheeks and toilet paper trailing at the end of his shoe. The student glanced at them both before running out of the bathroom without washing his hands, seemingly intimidated by both Harry and Louis. Louis broke the awkwardness by chuckling lightly, gesturing his thumb towards the door. "To think that you were just like him months ago, golden."
"Yeah, well, I've changed." Harry said dryly, sticking the cigarette in between his pink lips so that it brushed against his teeth. I didn't even need you to do it, thought triumphantly to himself. Though he knew deep inside, he didn't like how his change was taking a toll on how his life played out and the decisions he made. He shook his head and tried to erase all of the negative things from his mind, hearing footsteps walk against the wet bathroom floor to come near him, and so he tensed on impulse. "Have you changed?"
Harry could hear the footsteps stop several feet away from him, and he shut his eyes and let out a relaxed sigh, not thinking that he could handle closeness when it came to being around Louis. Not with a boyfriend roaming the halls of the school at this very time who could pop in here at any chance and see them. "What is your definition of changed?"
"Like-" Harry trailed off and found himself stuttering out a reply. "Just- a completely different person? Kinda like better than before? I don't know."
"Then I guess you could say that I've changed, yeah." Louis said in reply. A smile made his way onto his face, but it quickly faltered as his brain began to work itself with questions. Harry could tell from the pensive look on Louis' face that he was about to speak about it, and so he turned around and let his bum rest against the sink so that he was now staring into a pair of ocean blue eyes that he hated to admit- but he missed so much. "So, Zayn huh?"
I definitely saw this coming. "He's really sweet, not that different from you actually- not in that way but- I-"
"Yeah, I know. We use to be best friends, broke off any type of contact with him after he couldn't get your name right-"
Harry raised his eyebrow. "What?"
"Long story," Louis said, forcing a laugh in hopes that Harry would join him, but there was only a longer and more torturous pause between them. "Is he better than me?"
"What is your definition of better than me?" the curly haired boy mocked, causing Louis to growl underneath his breath. Harry quickly shut his mouth.
"Does he- Does he treat you better than I ever did? When he kisses you, do you feel like you want to be with him forever? When you fuck him-" Harry could hear Louis' breathing become labored the more his questions poured out of him, and he reluctantly gripped onto the sink so that he wouldn't walk over and wrap his arms around the small boy. "When you fuck him, does he do it without clothes and do you feel happy knowing that there's no burden in your life anymore? That you don't have to worry about him having scars or- The tattoos. Did you guys get them together? I just want to be in the loop that I'm so currently falling out of."
Harry remained unmoved, staring at Louis while trying to process his words. "I haven't had sex with Zayn, number 1." Louis began to clench and unclench his hand with uneasiness, nodding with understanding and appreciation. "Number 2, I got these tattoos by myself and none of them have to do with Zayn. They're all about you, you, you. Does he treat me better: sure, but that's not what matters Louis. I can't really explain it but-"
"Can I see the ones on your chest? Like above the butterfly?" Louis questioned, cutting Harry off while looking through his sheer black button up. Harry hesitated and kept his mouth closed as Louis walked closer, never breaking eye contact in fear that the boy would try to stop everything from happening. Suddenly, Harry felt Louis' hands brush against his skin while unbuttoning his shirt in the middle of the quiet bathroom, allowing him to drown out the sounds of his brain screaming no. When Louis had the shirt unbuttoned completely, he let his finger trace over one out of the two birds facing one another on Harry's chest, observing how each ink mark looked careful and drawn out. "This...this reminds me of something."
"Your poem," Harry said quickly, swallowing down the thick feeling in his throat. "About the birds- I took it from your room after you left, and kept it. One of the first tattoos I got."
Louis let his palm rest flatly against Harry's, now chiseled and muscular, chest and Harry felt his insides turn into mush from how good it felt to be touched by Louis again. It was almost foreign,but it was good nevertheless. Harry knew that this whole situation was wrong and that he should be pushing Louis away just as the boy did to him months ago, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it. It was almost like he was trapped under a love spell that required an antidote that didn't exist. Almost like he was on drugs.
"I really want to kiss you right now." Louis whispered, bringing his hand up to run his thumb across Harry's bottom lip that was still it's perfect pink like he remembered it to be. I'm so screwed, Harry thought absentmindedly. Louis' face started to move closer until their noses were only inches apart, and their eyes were burning into one another with so much intensity that Harry hadn't felt in a while. He closed his eyes and waited for Louis' thin lips to press against his for the first time in months, but nothing came. "But I won't."
Harry choked down a whine and snapped his eyes open, watching as Louis pulled back with an unreadable expression. Kiss me you fool! Harry wanted to shout, but he wouldn't let his dignity flush itself down the toilet. He took too long to build that up again. Have some respect for yourself, Styles. You have a boyfriend for crying out loud! "Okay."
"When you're ready to try again with me, I'll be here. Until then, enjoy your little fairytale with Zayn." and then Louis was out of the bathroom, almost as quick as he came.
NOTE: HI WTF LOVE ME
DID YOU ENJOY THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE?????
QUESTION: WHO ARE YOU ROOTING FOR RIGHT NOW
LOUIS / HARRY/ ZAYN/ NAIL/ OR THAT RANDOM GUY IN THE BATHROOM.
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YOU ARE READING
toxic [larry stylinson] ✔️
Fanfiction❝ he'd closed the door to all the emotions years ago, but now, the aroma that seeped from his flawless skin was an intoxicating mixture of lilacs and rain, captivating his senses. ❞ warning; lots of sexual tension.