❝ how can I be happy when one of the reasons why I smile is now gone
.
.
.
now so far away from me, that I couldn't reach them-even if I tried? ❞
α куσ ѕσнмα ησνєℓ
...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
. . . . . .
|the same day (before Kyo went out but a diff pov)|
—
Yuki wakes up in a halt. Cold sweat and tears were running down his face as a soft sob left his mouth. He was dreaming of that day again. He didn't want to. He didn't want to reminisce how he felt at that time. How it happened. Oh, how he didn't want to remember anything of it again. Of you.
He remembered those nights when it kept repeating.
That scene.
Of her.
over
And over again.
His tears kept falling and falling but he didn't seem to care, letting them fall and land onto the soft blanket he was gripping onto not too long ago. After a few minutes had passed, he wipes off all of his sweat and tears using a cloth he kept nearby before looking and checking the time on the clock.
4 am.
Sighing, he slowly stood up off his bed before walking out of his room. Normally he would just take a quick walk outside and to his garden whenever he had this dream which was usually.. a lot.. but right now, he only wanted to sit down on the roof of the house. Wanting to breathe the fresh, cold outside air.
He slowly goes up the ladder, making his way towards the edge of the roof. He sits down slowly and quietly as to not wake up everyone, who were inside the house, still sleeping as he stares at the dark sky in front of him.
Yuki always kept his thoughts to himself but now,.. he only wanted to share them with someone. He wanted to finally tell someone about how he felt. Of how much pained he had endured. He wanted to scream, to shout. He wanted to let out all of his emotions. He knew that it would make him selfish but why not be selfish once in awhile?
His thoughts were all jumbled up. The only thing he could do right now was zone out into nothingness, knowing that nothing could help him now. Nothing. Not even those happy memories of you.
Sometimes..
Only sometimes..
He wanted to be like Kyo.
Oblivious.
Oblivious to the fact that his best friend, Yuki's first love, ended her own life. Right in front of him. Yet he just stood there, helpless. Yuki always blamed Kyo on the outside but on the inside, his heart, he always blamed himself for her death.
