Meeting Dan (Danisnotonfire)

Chapter 3 - Is this a dream?

We began to talk about really random, casual things like films, tv shows and music. We had so much in common, it was crazy just talking to him about really random things. I didn't say too much about my own music taste. I was always picked on and called 'emo' for liking bands such as my chemical romance, bring me the horizon, black veil brides and bands like that. 

"Are you always this shy?" Dan giggled as we approached his apartment. "When i meet new people then yeah" I laughed. When i meet insanely gorgeous, famous YouTubers like you then of course i am shy and awkward! This is what was going through my mind, but i remembered to stay calm, and not look like a total loser. 

As we approached the apartment complex Dan opened the door for me and said "ladies first!" i smiled and couldn't help but giggle slightly. "Your laugh is adorable!" Dan said, as we walked towards the lift. "It's really not! It's so lame!" I said. He just sighed and looked at me, showing his cute smile. Oh my god, i couldn't handle it! My legs were shaking and i was so nervous i felt like i was going to puke. This was actually happening, i was actually about to go into Dan's apartment. 

We reached his floor and left the lift, walking towards his door. He unlocked it and held out his arm signalling me to go in first. I went in and just stood there, not knowing what to do. Dan suddenly shouted "Coffee?" Whist putting his jacket in his bedroom. "Umm, yes please" i shouted, still feeling weak at the knees. "You can sit down you know?" He laughed pointing at the sofa. I smiled awkwardly and placed myself on the seat. He brought my coffee over to me and sat down next to me. "So, tell me a bit about yourself?" He asked, handing me the printed mug. 

"Well, there's not much to tell really.." I started. "I moved here not long ago with my friend Leah and we've just settled in really. I'm 18, and i just finished college studying psychology, media and film studies. Me and Leah really wanted a fresh start for both of us so we thought we would come here for a change of scenery. She is dead set on what she wants to do as a career, but i have no idea, so right now i'm just working in New Look to pay the rent really." 

I took a sip of the coffee, trying hard not to look at Dan. I knew if i would i would be fixated on looking into his deep brown eyes. 

"Well that sounds awesome! I love films, so that's cool. You seem like an amazing person Ivy. You're really funny and easy to get along with and you're so pretty!" 

I could feel a lump in my throat. My eyes were filling with tears. I couldn't accept compliments. I kept hearing those voices in my head. You're not good enough. You're pathetic! Look at yours cuts, no one is going to want you! You're ugly and fat. Accept it! A tear rolled down my cheek and Dan quickly put down his coffee and placed his hand on my cheek. 

"Hey, what's wrong? Have i said something?" I couldn't be honest with him. I couldn't tell him everything that was going on in my head. "I'm fine, honestly, i'm just not good at accepting compliments, i'm really self concious." Dan sighed and lifted up my chin, looking right into my eyes. "You have really gorgeous green eyes, you know that? And your hair is awesome, and i love your style, and you're so short it's cute. You're perfect, and beautiful okay? Don't ever think different." 

Wow, Dan Howell actually just said this to me? I couldn't believe it. But the longer i knew him, the less i saw him as 'Danisnotonfire' He was just Dan. And i really liked him... I know it's not normal to fall for people this quickly but i really felt a connection with him, and there was definitely a spark. I looked deep into his eyes, as he played with my hair and wiped the tears from my cheek. He leaned towards me, and then it happened..

I don't know how it happened, but it did. Our lips met. His lips were so soft pressed against mine. We kissed gently for a while, and then both began to smile as we pulled away. I didn't know what was going to happen, but i could not believe that this was actually happening to me..