Willing to You

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

[LAEL SHAWN]

I was standing in the doorway while staring at Vallesteros and Iael roaming their eyes around my penthouse.

Yes, they moved with me. Wala namang magagawa si Umika dahil kung susubukan niyang hindi sumunod ay ilalayo ko sa kanya ang bata.

When I told her that I would take the child away from her, part of me trembled when I saw her tears cascading on her face and begging me no.

But I shrugged the guilt away dahil hindi na niya ako maloloko pa ulit. Not this time.

"Kuya Lael, dito na po ba ang new house namin?" Nagising ako sa aking pagkatulala nang marinig ang tanong ni Iael─my son. My four year-old son whom has been deprived of fatherly love because of his selfish mother who took him away from me.

Suddenly, I hated the way he calls me 'Kuya Lael', my eyes drifted to Umika na nakamasid lamang sa aming dalawa at nang magtagpo ang aming tingin ay agaran itong umiwas.

I got a glimpse of her puffed eyes. Did she cry all night? I should not care but something inside me was tugged at the thought of her crying al night.

Someone tugged at my shirt kaya naman bumalik ang tingin ko kay Iael sa aking harapan. I squatted in front of him to level with his height.

"Yes, buddy. Starting today ay rito na kayo titira ni Mommy." I said while caressing his cheeks lightly.

Tumango-tango naman ito ngunit ang naguguluhang ekspresyon ay nakalarawan pa rin sa mukha nito.

"But why po? We have our own house na po diba?" He asked innocently but the thought na muling malalayo sa akin ang anak ko infuriated me.

I took a deep breath before answering him, "Buddy, here's the thing; I've been gone for the last few years of your life kaya naman babawi ako. At hindi na ako papayag malayo pa ulit sa'yo─sa inyo." I looked at Umika while saying the last few words.

I saw her blinking to hide her tears but I saw it. Lumingon din ang bata sa kanya kaya naman agad itong naghain nang kiming ngiti.

Mula sa aking harapan ay muling lumapit kay Umika si Iael.

"But Mommy, bakit po tayo rito titira kina Kuya Iael? Hindi naman po natin siya relative diba?" His question was rather innocent but it made my blood boil sa katotohanang hindi ako kilala ng sarili kong anak.

I laughed mockingly while looking at Umika, I saw her trembled before explaining to our son or that was what I thought she would do.

"Baby, he-he's my...my friend kasi. Mommy's friend kaya he's letting us stay for a while in his house." She said habang iniiwasan ang nagbabaga kong tingin.

This woman is really a piece of work.

Naihilamos ko na lamang ang aking palad sa aking mukha upang pakalmahin ang aking sarili dahil ayoko naman maging bayolente sa harap ng bata.

I sighed deeply and looked at them both.

"Let's go." Umika looked confused but did not ask any question, she took the hand of the Iael and led him to the door.

After I closed the door, I took the other hand of Iael on the other side and we walked side by side to the elevator.

The ride to the grocery store was silent. Umika kept on dodging away my stares while the kid was quiet probably because naninibago? Na hindi naman dapat kung hindi lang kami nagkalayo.

When we arrived at the Grocery store ay namili kami ng mga kakailanganin nila─no, namin sa aming tahanan.

Before I knew that I have a child, my pantry's stock were all coffee, beer and instant foods but I believed that I will change na now that I have a child and a woman in my home.

I looked at Umika habang tila pinagsasabihan nito ang bata while we were in the candy section kaya naman dali-dali akong lumapit sa kanila.

"I told you, Iael diba? Too much candy will destroy your teeth. Gusto mo ba yun?" I heard her asked authoritatively but using her soft voice that I saw the kid nodded but with tears brimming on his eyes.

I don't know what's gotten into me but my hand automatically found her waist nang makalapit ako sa kanila. I felt her tensed beneath my touch kaya naman I squeezed her waist lightly. I saw her stared at me on my peripheral vision but I looked at Iael instead.

"Buddy, you can get whatever you want. Ako bahala kay Mommy." I winked at the kid who almost leaped with joy when he heard what I said.

Agad-agad itong tumakbo sa kabilang aisle para siguro kuhain ang kung anuman. I was about to follow him when I felt that Umika's not budging on her stand. I looked at her questioningly but she just gave me a poker faced at tila ba napapasong lumayo sa akin.

"What the hell are you doing Lael Shawn?" She asked yelling yet whispering, if that even makes sense but she did it anyway.

"What am I doing exactly, Vallesteros? Tell me." I asked her mockingly.

Umiling-iling ito and she looked at me with resolved expression.

"I told you. Hindi mo siya anak."

What she said made me grabbed her by the arm, not that tight but enough to squeezed it.

"No matter what lies you would say, I knew in my heart that Iael is my flesh and blood." And I made sure that I gave emphasis to every word.

She looked at me with teary-eyes kaya naman napabitaw ako sa pagkakahawak ko sa kanya.

Instead, kinabig ko siya sa aking bisig.

"Let's just fix whatever issue we had in the past for the sake of our son." I could feel her resisting my hug ngunit kalaunan ay bumigay rin. I could feel her tears on my shirt but I just shushed her.

"Hayaan mong bumawi ako sa inyo."

"Please." I said almost begging.

Later on, I felt her nodding on my chest.

"Mommy! Kuya Lael! I got five pockies!"

Agad kaming napahiwalay sa isa't-isa nang marinig namin si Iael na papalapit sa amin.