Love everlasting - Avengers fanfic

Im drowning

*mention of suicide and depression*

You fell asleep with all your clothes on that night after what had been one of the worst days in your life. You hated yourself for making Tony feel this way, and you hated Loki for making you feel this way. It was one big mix of emotions, and you couldn't really figure out what to do with any of it.

There's a silent knock on the door, waking you up from your dreamless sleep. You cover your ears with the pillow hoping whoever it is will just leave you alone, you need the sleep.

There's a louder knock on the door. You sigh deeply, as you try to crawl out of bed, slowly opening the door. And the person on the other side of the door was definitely not who you expected.

"Thor do you have any idea what time it is?" You yawn exhaustedly.

"Nighttime" Thor smiles broadly.

You chuckle as you open the door allowing him to come inside with you. "Can you make This Quick Im tired" You say as you crawl Back into bed.

"I'll be quick" Thor sighs. You get a sick feeling in your stomach, you've never heard him this quiet before, somethings wrong.

"What is it Thor?" You question.

"I can't visit you again" Thor says coldly.

You stare at him in confusion. "Okay? Why not?" You ask confusedly.

"I belive my father was right about you, and therefore I think it would be better if I don't visit you as often anymore" Thor explains as he takes a step away from you.

"Thor you can't be serious" you say stunned, feeling as your heart skips a beat.

"I had a talk with my father, and we agree it's best to keep you banishment from Asgard.. You're a dangerous person  y/n, I can't risk anything letting you into my kingdom again" Thor says quietly, his words leaving scars with each word. "You are not the person I once loved, I see that now"

"What's going on with you?" You ask, confused.

"Nothings wrong, I've simply realized who you truly are" Thor growls..

You get up from your bed opening up the door. "Get out of my room, I don't know what I've done to deserve this treatment. But I would like you to leave"

Thor walks out the door, before he leaves you speak once more.

"I'm not what you say I am.. Find me when you're ready to apologize to me" you scoff. "I did love you Thor, and I loved your brother in ways I could not myself comprehend" you say as your voice softens.

For a second you see his expression soften, he looks... guilty. You stand in silence Watching as Thor walks away from you.

You crumble down onto the floor, you didn't think this day could get any worse, but it turns out you were wrong. Everyone on this team hates you, then can't even look at you.

You don't sleep that night, you kay awake wondering what to do, but there's no solution where you come out on top of this.

You scream into the pillow, you wish you could undo all the pain you had caused, that there was a way for you too just let it all go.

You go into the kitchen as soon as the sun starts to hit you window. You look into the fridge, unable to make a decision. You can't think about anything else but the night prior to you. You slam the fridge shut, resting your forehead against the cold metal door.

"Y/n?" A quiet voice calls out. You don't recognize it at first, as soon as you turn around you see Clint. "Are you okay?" He asks confusedly.

You take a deep breath, trying to gather yourself. "I'm fine, why shouldn't I be?" You chuckle nervously.