Owen and Amelia had a moment or rather many moments
But suddenly after one of those moments Owen never spoke to Amelia again, and even worse, he constantly ignored her for weeks.
AMELIAS POV
"Shepherd" I heard Owen call my name and run after me down the hallways of the emergency room.
"I remind you that you put your tongue in my mouth so I think that gives you the right to call me by my first name" I replied coldly
"Amelia, I didn't mean to hurt you, I assure you, I would like us to... how long are you going to be mad at me?" he asked
"we could be friends" he added and I just laughed
"Listen, you know very well that being with you would be against the rules and I could..." he said
"Yes, I know the rules but you didn't follow them" I said
"I know" he said ashamed
"It is not only forbidden to sleep with a colleague, it is also forbidden to give her lustful looks" I said
"Amelia" he tried to cut me off but I continued
"to let your hand land on mine for too long, to stared at me openly and everywhere is also against the rules" I said
"what are you accusing me of" he asked me
"I say that you fell in love with me and that too is totally against the rules, and I also fell in love with you but you did nothing to discourage my feelings" I said
"I never took advantage of you" he replied
"I never said that but" he cut me off
"but what?" he asked
"What I mean is that there were two of us and now you're acting like it's my fault!
So yes, maybe I started it but you kissed me back and then you tell me it can never happen? You don't talk to me for weeks, you constantly push me away, you're messing with me it's a total waste of time!" I said and without even realizing it I started screaming
"I didn't know how to handle this I'm sorry" he said softly almost like a whisper
"At least admit that you felt the same way. Admit that it wasn't just in my head and that it wasn't just my imagination and that it wasn't just my fault"
"no it was real... but it can't be real it can't happen even if something happened we stopped before it went any further" he said and left
Of course, our fight in the hospital hallways hadn't gone unnoticed, and the first one to come into my office was Derek and we ended up yelling at each other
"You are calling me a slut ?" I asked.
"What I want to know is why you keep mixing sex and work?" He asked
"In other words, you're calling me a slut" I replied
"Every time you decide to sleep with a doctor in this hospital who is also a friend of mine" he said but I cut him off
"I didn't sleep with him damn it and even if I had wouldn't be your problem" I added
"I don't care how many guys you sleep with" he said
"You need to stop talking now".
"But Owen?" he yelled
"I didn't sleep with him and even if I had it is still none of your fucking business " I yelled back
"It is my business you're my sister !, your choices reflect on me,on my reputation and on my legacy !"
"Get out, get out of my office" I said
"I'm not done" he said
"Great so I'm the one who's leaving" and that's exactly what I did, I grabbed my bag and slammed the door of my office violently
Then I wanted to go home, or rather to Derek and Meredith's house.
The next morning I left for work with Meredith
"Are you ok?" Meredith asked me in the car
"We never talked about what happened with Hunt and the fight between you and Derek" she said
"I didn't sleep with Hunt" I said
"I feel and I think the whole hospital feels the tension between you two" she said
"I didn't sleep with him" I repeated
"frankly I don't care if you sleep with him or not what bothers me is that you refuse to talk to me" she said
"He may be promoted to chief of surgery and I'm supposed to take Derek's job when he goes to Washington.
And if anything happens between us, people might think it's for privilege.
He says that if we're a couple, it could jeopardize both our jobs. He says he's doing it to protect me... I didn't sleep with him" I said with tears in my eyes.
"Ok" she said
"Thank you very much" I said
After a full day of working while avoiding Owen which I did successfully until a trauma came in and forced us to operate together for 3 hours.
Now I was in the attendings' lounge making myself something to eat when Owen came in.
"You did a good job today" he said while grabbing a snack from the cupboard.
"I know I do a good job every day" I said
"Stop being so cold and distant when I talk to you" he asked.
"You think I want to be like this? I don't want to but I have to if I want to absolutely avoid all the feelings I have for you because even though I'm extremely angry those feelings won't go away and after what you've done to me I think the least you can do is let me be cold and distant to you!" I said
"Oh because you think I don't feel anything for you? Amelia that's not true I have feelings for you too and believe me the only thing I would like to do is to show you how strong my feelings for you are" he said and came closer to me and I closed my eyes when I felt his head and cheek against mine
"I'm so sorry" he whispered in my ear and he stepped back and leaned against the furniture
"You know if Mark was still here he probably would have said something like "Who cares about the rules if you want to be with someone, do it" I said and Owen and I were extremely close and our lips were just a breath apart
"they're going to make me chief of surgery" he whispered "and I want you to be chief of neurosurgery because you deserve it, but if anything happens between us it won't be possible and I don't want to take that away from you"
"So we can't be together because of my promotion?" I asked
"Yeah" he said
"Or is it because of your promotion that you're worried about?" I asked very clearly annoyed
"No Amelia no" he replied
"I think it is" I said and left the room
I was so angry at Owen and even more so than before, and I can't understand him, I don't know what he wants or what he's preventing me from talking to him.
So yes maybe I have my share of fault in our story but I don't know how to do it I want a relationship with him and it's weird coming from me.
I always had a wall around me to protect me from what's happening to me now and my wall was always high and strong until the day I met owen and in less than a month he made my wall collapse and everything fell apart for what?
For nothing to have my heart broken again.
After this very difficult day I went home where Derek and Meredith and the kids were not there they were all gone for the weekend.
When I got home I ordered some food and sat in front of the TV while eating.
All of a sudden I got a storm warning on my phone and 5 minutes later the rain and the storm was already hitting the city
Shit, I'm alone and I'm scared of storms
At the same time I heard a knock on the door so I went to open the door and saw Owen on the porch soaking wet
"Owen? What are you doing out here in the storm you shouldn't be" I said but he cut me off
" I'm in love with you and I had been in love with you since...well it feels like forever and I'm failing at it I'm failing at being your boss I'm failing at being your friend I'm failing at loving you I'm feeling at protecting you I am failing at everything but please forgive me for all the things that I have done to you, I was scared but Amelia forgive me because I love you and I want to be with you"
I stood there in front of him not knowing what to say, no words came out of my mouth.
Seeing that I didn't answer he looked at me one last time and then he turned around and walked to his car and then all of a sudden I started to run as fast as I could to catch up with him
"Owen!" I shouted and he turned around
« I don't wanna fight anymore I don't wanna fight Derek I don't wanna fight you,I am so tired and sad and sick of being angry all the time I just want to feel and to be in a safe place. And I don't know how or why and I can't explain it but you are the safest place I have, and everything will be okay for the first time in a really long time if you will just start kissing me now"
And that's exactly what he did he kissed me and for the first time in a long time I felt good.
We didn't care if it was raining or not we were finally in each other's arms we stood there for a long time before the lightning struck not so far away so Owen took me by the hand and we ran inside the house
We were soaking wet so we put on dry clothes and I lit the fireplace and we lay next to it in each other's arms with a blanket over us
"Owen?" I said.
"Yeah" he said.
"I love you too" I said and he smiled
For the first time I wasn't afraid of the storm I was happy and felt safe in my safe place
