Lillian Henry is seventeen years old when her 20 year-old brother, Adam, and his best friend, Blake Kingston, enroll in the army. And she's eighteen, when they come back, her feelings left unchanged. As for his, they're even stronger than before.
T...
"September 15th, alright, that's noted," I say through the phone before hanging up.
Lily puts her book down and looks up at me, both pride and sadness in her gaze. She's proud that I enrolled again, because it helps people, it helps a cause, but also because she knows why I am doing this, she knows that I am doing this for myself before anyone else. And she's sad, because I'm leaving again, in approximately a month and a half.
It's crazy how summer has gone by so quickly. It feels like I just came back, like I just kissed Lily, like she just became my girlfriend. Yet, it's been weeks.
I let my body fall back on the bed, wrapping my arms around her legs and resting my head on her thighs. I cover her skin with light kisses as she runs her fingers through my hair, almost putting me to sleep. But I lift up my head, my eyes meeting hers. She forces a smile. I can see how scared she is, even if she's trying to hide it. She's an open book to me, I can read her like no one else can.
She's scared of me leaving and never coming back, she's scared of being alone, scared of herself. I take her hand in mine, kissing the back of it. "Stop worrying. I would never do anything risky, knowing that you are waiting on me, knowing that when I'll come back, you'll be there to welcome me home, to tap me out."
"I'll stop worrying if you promise me not to worry about me," she tells me, knowing so damn well that this is not possible.
I trust her, of course, I do.
But there's always those what ifs.
What if she comes across Rainer Hayes and goes down that dark path of yours again? What if she closes up and does not go to someone when things get hard? What if she gets tired of waiting? What if she meets someone else? Someone that didn't leave her behind, someone that's always there, or just a phone call away.
"I'll be fine," she kisses my forehead. "I'll continue working at the coffee shop, I'll go back to school, I'll be so busy that in a snap you'll be back. And if I ever get those feelings again, I'll call my therapist, or I'll go to Zora, I promise not to keep it inside. And even though I know you're not the jealous type, I want you to know that there's only one man that I want, and it is you. I will wait for you."
I guess Lily isn't the only person that can be read like a book. I'm an open book just as much as she is.
"I'm going to miss you so much, you have no idea," I don't cry often, but right now, the idea of leaving hits close to home.
"Hey, don't cry," Lily reaches to my cheek, wiping the tears away. "We've still have more than a month together, you'll cry on the day you leave, okay? Today is a happy day, like the rest of the summer, alright?"
"Okay. No crying."
I wrap my arms around her, rolling in order to find myself under her. She's straddling me and I feel myself hardened, maybe it wasn't my best idea, we have to go to her house for some family event she invited me to. I know most of her family, many aunts and uncles, a few cousins, her grandparents on her mother's side, because her grandparents on her dad's side died when she was just a baby. So, I shouldn't be nervous. But I am. Because the few other times I have seen them, I was Adam's best friend, and now, I am their little protégée's boyfriend. She's the first daughter, first niece, first granddaughter, everyone cares deeply about her, and has a special attachment to her. If they don't like me, it's over.
"They already love you."
"How can you possibly know? We haven't even gone to the gathering yet."
"I told my grandma on the phone. She was thrilled, and I quote Oh, I love Blake, he always has been really sweet, and he's handsome. Perfect for my Lillian," I feel like she's exaggerating, adding things her grandma didn't say, but she looks serious, she doesn't look like she's about to burst out laughing.
"Fine," I say, "maybe your grandma likes me, but I know, for sure, that your uncle John never has liked me. I remember a time when we were younger, he called me an ungrateful bastard because I said I didn't like spinach and there was only a spinach salad."
"He was drunk. Plus, he won't be there, it would be awkward, since he was mom's sister's husband and they got a divorce. So, technically, he isn't my uncle anymore."
"You always have an answer for everything don't you."
"Yes. Now, come on, get dressed, and meet me at my house in thirty minutes."
"Wait, where are you going?"
"To go get ready... I'm not going to go to a family gathering in my pajamas."
"That's my shirt," I dare her with a gaze, but she disagrees, telling me that it now belongs to her because it fits her best and is too comfortable to give it back.
She kisses me before heading downstairs, shouting, "See you soon, love you," before closing the door behind her.
I shake my head in disbelief, unsure of what just happened. I have no idea where her boost of energy and happiness comes from, but I am here for it. She always looks drop dead gorgeous, but even more with a smile on her face, with joy shining in her eyes.
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