Newt Imagines (The Maze Runner)

Alive

You could spend your whole life wondering if you would never know what it feels like to be alive. Really, properly alive, that is, not this dreary day to day surviving that makes up most of your days in the Glade. You have a pulse, your blood is still good enough to force your heart through yet another set of paces, but it's not enough. You don't know that it will ever be enough.

Perhaps it's the lack of freedom that keeps making you feel this way. You certainly have enough exertion in your life to give you probable cause to feel something a little stronger. After all, you and your fellow Gladers are the only things keeping you from certain death. Despite your best efforts, though, you cannot shake the obvious truth that you are in a prison, and that prison will keep you tied down until the day you die. In the life you lead, that may come sooner than you think.

Death is common enough in the Glade, as evident by the small graveyard in the back of the Deadheads. It should be enough to convince you of the merit of your own life, to let you seize the day because you know quite well that it may be your last. Still, your hours peter off into drudgery, and you cannot make yourself believe that any one of your days are worth the effort you put into them.

Shouting voices echo around you like the calls of birds, and you dimly realize that this must mark the end of the work day. Everyone has been released from their shifts at last. Most of the boys head over to their friends, slinging arms around shoulders and sharing what happened to them during the past few hours, all the jokes that have been quietly stewing in their heads now begging to be spoken aloud for greatest comedic effect.

Not all of the Gladers seem so happy to be off work, though. It's not like they're begging to be let back into their daily jobs, they're just more like you, more apathetic. You wrap up the task you were doing before break was called and head out, rambling aimlessly through the Glade in search of something to fill your hours.

You used to be more like the more exuberant Gladers once, but you've been here for what's coming up on three years. Despite all the work it takes to maintain the place, the Glade is small, and you can feel the walls of the Maze bearing down on you, forcing you to stay in place. You made your jokes a long time ago, their fountains of cheer have now run dry. There are no hilarious anecdotes left in you, just a deep, shifting weight of too much time on your hands.

You're still not alone, though, despite your best assumptions. Soon enough, you're greeted by your own name shouted aloud, your own friend coming up to grin at you. Newt's been here almost as long as you have, yet he still finds a way to make his days worth something. There was a time, once, when he couldn't. Neither of you dare to bring it up, but your eyes still flicker over to his bad leg every now and then when you're sure he can't see it.

Newt, in his tenure, has learned to read you just as well as the grounds of the Glade. He taps a hand lightly against your shoulder blade to get your attention.

"What's up with you?" He asks, frowning slightly. "You seem more tired than normal. Sleep alright?"

You lift a shoulder. "Sleep was fine. It's just– I'm sick of this place, you know? Nothing ever changes."

"Repetition keeps us safe," Newt reminds you, "I'm more worried about what happens when things start changing."

You sigh. "I know. I'm glad to be alive, obviously, but how long are we supposed to be here, doing all this? The Creators had to have put us in here for a reason, but I just don't get it."

Newt nods slowly. "I've been thinking a lot of the same things. Guess we'll just have to wait and see, though. When the time comes and our situation starts shifting, I'll make sure you're the first to know."

He says his last bit with a sort of smile, and once again you're amazed by how he's able to stay positive so easily. If there is a pessimistic bone in his body, Newt is able to cover it up with the grace of a master illusionist.