Her and the Basketball Champion

chapter 25

Eliza

When we leave the music department, we both walk silently beside each other to the sixth form centre. I need to tell Lily everything, because I know that I won't be able to keep any of this a secret. I'm sure I'll explode. 

We don't say a word to each other, and I'm glad, because it's not a forced or awkward silence, it's comfortable. 

Jonas pulls open the door for me and I walk through, throwing him a smile as he follows behind me. 

I stop and look around the foyer, trying to see if I can find Lily. Jonas stands beside me. I don't want to move, and when I spot Lily, I turn to look at him, and see he's already looking at me. His expression is blank, but his eyes show an unidentified emotion I still can't place. 

"I'v gotta go. Lily's probably wondering where I am." I look across to where Lily sits with Sarah, chatting away as they share a packet of crisps, laughing at something on their phones. 

If I could do anything do freeze this moment and stay standing here with Jonas, I would but I'm not a fancy superhero.

He nods and follows my eyes to where my friends sit, then looks back at me again. 

"I'll see you later?" I want to agree with him, but I hesitate to answer him. I honestly have no idea if I'm going to see him again, but I know that I shouldn't. I can't. I need to get over these feelings, because I know that nothing will ever happen between us. 

Jonas senses my hesitation and I can see his shoulders slump just a fraction. If I wasn't looking at him, I wouldn't have seen it. 

It's for the best, I guess.

I nod my head slowly, acknowledging the silent words between us. We won't be seeing each other anytime soon. 

I have to literally force my legs to move away from him, and as I'm walking towards the table, I look back to find Jonas staring at me. He still hasn't moved from where we were standing, and when he catches my eyes, he turns around and walks out of the building.

Well, fuck.

I hear a shout and turn around again to look at Lily, forcing a smile on my face as I see her frantically waving at me. 

I can't help but let a wider, more real smile take over my face when Sarah joins her and they both look like idiots as they stand up from their chairs, calling my name and earning glares from students who are studying around them. 

I walk over to them and sit myself down next to Sarah. It's the only free spot on the table, since it's break time and a gloomy day, so the sixth form centre is really packed. 

I refrain from blurting everything that just happened, out in front of everyone. I still havn't told Sarah about me liking Jonas, and she just thinks that I hate him and he's just a random dude who knows Lily.

Well, he's far from that now. 

I'm broken away from my thoughts when Lily directs a question at me, making my eyes widen. 'so, why were you walking with Jonas?" She says with a smirk on her face. 

I awkwardly smile at their questioning glances and shrug my shoulders at Lily's question, trying to avoid the topic. "He was walking here too, so we just ended up walking together. Why, is there a problem?" I reply. I was hoping not to have to lie, but I don't really want to alert the whole world of my 'complications' with Jonas. I also don't want Sarah to see ma as some sort of part time muslim who picks and chooses between the rules. 

I don't want to ruin her image of me.

"No problem here." Lily wiggles her eyebrows, and I raise mine, giving her a look of 'not now, not yet'. She gets the message and furrows her eyebrows, telling me that she knows somethings up.

She knows that I want to keep whatever this is private, and she knows that Sarah doesn't know everything like Lily does. I mean to be frank, nothing that big has happened between me and Jonas. Except for the fact that he literally picked me up and took me home when I fainted and walked me home at night. Plus those touches which were totally NOT halal. It's not like it wes deliberate on my end. 

Anyway.

I look over at Sarah and see her staring at me with a questioning look. I just shrug it off and reach over to grab a crisp from their packet. 

"So, what are ya'll doing?" I ask, trying to change the subject away from me and Jonas.

"Oh nothing, just watching some tiktoks. Got nothing better to do right?" Sarah replies, with a little laugh. I laugh along. "Right." I say, because there really is nothing else we do at break except from watching stupid videos and criticising them. What? Who doesn't do that?

The rest of our break time is spent doing just that, and I momentarily forget about everything that has happened, enjoying my time with my best friends. 

The rest of the day goes by achingly slowly and I often catch my thoughts drifting towards a certain person, who is always in the back of my mind, even if it's subconscious. It's like he never leaves, especially after everything he's told me. 

I still feel overwhelmed, but every second of the day, my feelings towards him grow. Just like he said his did for me. 

I still can't get over the fact that he feels that way about me, and on the walk home, my mind is still puzzling over it, dumbfounded that someone, let alone him, the basketball champion, with his beautiful eyes and raven hair, likes me. 

I'm stunned, and still doubt it's true, but I can't help believing him, because no-one has confessed to me like that before. 

I unlock the front door to my house and make my way upstairs, dumping everything on my bed, starting to get ready for my shift at the Cafe. I make wudu and pray, making sure I ask Allah for guidance. In everything, but most importantly whatever is happening with Jonas and me. 

I can't risk anything in the name of anything haram. 

Once I'm done, I change my clothes into my work attire and fasten on my black hijab, makiing sure that I don't look like death on legs. 

I don't really wear makeup, because thank God my skin is quite clear. Sometimes I get the odd few spots, but apart from that it's generally okay. Probably all the wudu I make. 

I walk downstairs, making sure to grab a jacket on the way, because it has started to get colder. 

As I step out of the house, I pull out my phone and scroll through my instagram feed, and any unchecked messages I have. I don't usually use my phone that much at school, since I'm in lessons, and at lunch and break I'm either always with my friends or in the music room. 

I turn a corner and walk towards the Cafe entrance, opening the door and sweeping my eyes over the surroundings. People have started to come in less now because of the cold weather that is settling in. They'd much rather be at home after work and school, in the comfort of their beds and fireplaces, sitting with their families. 

I would too, but a girls gotta make money somehow right?

As I look around me, my eyes settle on a familiar figure sitting against the back table, facing the door. He's already staring at me, probably from hearing the door open, and I freeze. Just when i'm trying to avoid him, he's there again.

All the fucking time.

He's always there.