Dangerous Desire

part. 25

BELLA

There's nothing I hate more than packing.

I'm only taking a small suitcase as it's only for a week but it's still managing to stress me out.

I've made a list of what I need so I don't forget anything, however, there's still something in the back of my mind that's telling me I'm going to forget something.

The last thing I have to do now is toiletries and that's simple. I mean if I forget anything, I'm sure my mother will have it.

I'm in the middle of deciding which body wash to take when my doorbell goes. I'm confused at first but then I remember I ordered some lunch. I'm leaving in two hours so I don't really have much time to cook, that and I can't be bothered.

Leaving my body wash for now, I head to my door and I'm shocked when it's not my food.

"Jinnie?"

"Hi," Hyunjin stands in front of me, covered in a hoodie and joggers. He has a small smile on his face as he shifts on one foot to the other.

"I thought you were my fried chicken," I joke with a laugh and he laughs too.

"Sorry to disappoint," he gives me a lopsided smile.

"What are you doing here anyway?" I ask, opening the door wider for him so he can walk through.

"Wanted to see you before you left, I was scared you already did," he answers and my heart flutters.

"I'm leaving at three-ish so don't worry," I reassure him as I close the door, following him to my kitchen.

"I also wanted to thank you,"

"Thank me?" I frown.

"For last night. I'm sorry I woke you up to that," he says sheepishly.

"There's no need to be sorry, I'm always here." I tell him with certainty which he gives me a sigh of relief in return.

He doesn't say anything to that, instead he wraps his arms around me in a hug. My body warms and I instantly return the hug, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"I missed you," he mumbles into my neck which makes goosebumps rise on my skin.

"I missed you too." I whisper, meaning it.

After hugging for a little, he eventually pulls away but still has his arms around my waist. Our cheeks brush softly against each other when he pulls away, keeping his face close to mine as he looks down at my lips.

I wait for him to make the first move, wanting him to be comfortable. And he does, pressing his lips gently against mine in a soft peck.

"Is that all you got?" I tease and he smirks a little before kissing me again, this time more forceful and needy.

Hyunjin surprises me when he's the one to take it further, pressing his tongue against my bottom lip. When our tongues meet, they dance together with a perfect rhythm, whilst my fingers run through his hair.

I let a soft, quiet moan slip and this makes him kiss me with more force, titling his head to the right to deepen the kiss.

I want to go further with Hyunjin but as he's inexperienced, I need to draw the line here. I need to stop now so he knows he doesn't have to do anything yet. But in the future, that line can be erased.

Pulling away from the kiss, I place a quick peck on his lips before looking up at him with a smile. "Let's stop here, I don't want you to rush into anything,"

"Okay," he nods. "But... I do want to do that with you at some point,"

"If that's what you want, I just want you to be one hundred percent sure and ready first," I tell him, continuing to run my hands through his hair whilst his arms are still secured around my waist.

Hyunjin shyly smiles. "Thank you," he gives me a soft peck on my lips. "How long are you going away for?"

"Only a week," I say and he pouts.

"I'll miss you,"

"I'll miss you too."

—

Being home feels like a breath of fresh air.

Getting out of the taxi, thanking the driver when he passes me my suitcase, I can't help but grin when my childhood home comes into view.

But before I can even step forward, my mother comes running out of the house and engulfing me in a big hug. She squeals with excitement, hugging me so tight I'm surprised she's not cutting off my circulation.

"Oh how I've missed you, my angel," my mother whispers in my ear, giving my cheek a kiss before eventually pulling away.

"I've missed you too," I look at her with teary eyed, similar to hers.

"Come on, Ma is waiting for you," she says, ushering me inside.

My heart fills with happiness once I'm inside, old memories flooding back. It hasn't changed one bit.

Whilst my mother takes my suitcase to my room, I head to my grandmothers pottery shop that is attached to our home. Walking in, the smell and sight brings nostalgia and I can't wipe off the huge smile on my face.

As soon as I see her sat in her usual seat where she makes her pots, I see she's currently painting one.

I clear my throat, standing in the doorway, when she looks up a huge smile grows on her face. Because of the arthritis in her hip, I make my way to her when she opens up her arms, engulfing me in a warm hug.

"Well I never thought it would be possible, you get more and more beautiful every time I see you," Ma says whist giving my cheek a kiss.

I breath a laugh. "Thank you, Ma. I missed you," I say, pulling away from the hug.

"I missed you too, angel," she replies, "How's school going?"

"Good," I answer, sitting on the stool next to her and watch as she continues to paint a pot.

"I'm sure you're doing amazing." She gives me a big smile which warms my heart. I've missed her so much.

For the rest of the day, the three of us spend time catching up and enjoying each other's company. I didn't realise how much I've missed being here with my family, even if it's just having dinner together or just watching films.

Right now, my mother and I are washing up the dishes after dinner. My grandmother has took herself up to bed seeing as it's nearing nine o'clock and she has to get up early to open up her shop.

I haven't had chance to have a moment with my mother alone in a long time, so I feel like now is the right time to talk to her about some things that have always been on my mind.

"Mama," I get her attention as I dry the plate she just washed with a tea towel.

"Yes, my love," she replies, washing another plate.

"Can I ask you something?" I say nervously, the realisation that I'm bringing up this topic dawning on me.

"Of course,"

After drying the plate, I place it back in the cupboard where it belongs and take a deep breath before asking, "why do you never talk about my father?"

My mother freezes and silence overtakes the kitchen, too loud for my liking.

"Please don't avoid my question," I whisper.

My mother sighs. "What do you want to know?"