Dangerous Desire

part. 08

HYUNJIN

I'm so nervous.

This whole date, I've been bouncing my leg up and down whilst fiddling with my beanie or the bracelet Hyejin made me with the letters Jinnie on it.

I still have no idea where I got my confidence from to ask Bella out, Jeongin's words were stuck in my mind ever since we ended the call and I guess they helped me. I was shitting myself, scared she was going to look at me like I grew three heads and reject me.

But she didn't.

All it took was her smile to make me feel faint and when she said yes, I thought my life was ending then and there.

It took me a few hours to pluck up the courage and text her where to meet me. This is my first ever date so I had to do some googling but nothing helped me. I grew a pair and asked my mum a good place to go, I didn't say I was going on a date because it's not unusual for me to go to restaurants alone.

She suggested this one and I feel like kissing my mother right now because it's the perfect place. I found the best table, in the corner and out of the way from nosy people.

I don't think Bella would appreciate people talking about how she's with me behind her back. Even if I'm used to it, I don't want to get her dragged into it. I know it's hypocritical, asking her on a date when I don't want her to get involved, but I'm becoming selfish with her. I want her, want to get to know her.

I just hope it doesn't hurt her in the process, I'd never forgive myself.

I was worried it would be awkward, like we won't have much to say, but surprisingly we've been talking like we've known each other for years. At first, I admit I had no idea what to say, until Bella took the lead and I was incredibly grateful.

It's difficult going out of your comfort zone. If it's asking Bella out or even wearing a t-shirt in public, I feel proud of myself.

"How did you get into sculpting?"

Bella's question brings me back and I look at her taking a sip of her water.

I clear my throat before answering, "Well because my mother's an artist she inspired me, really. She's helped me and taught me many things over the years that I wanted to do it myself and maybe get somewhere with it." I feel my cheeks redden at my sudden confession, I've never spoke about my mother that much before.

Bella's face softens and a grin takes over her lips. "That's so cute." I feel my cheeks redden even more at her comment and I get embarrassed, scratching my neck with an awkward laugh.

"What about you?" I direct the conversation to her, feeling exposed with the topic on me.

"My grandmother." she answers without hesitation. "She makes clay pots and sells them. I remember her teaching me when I was young, I pressed on the pedal too hard and the wheel went too fast. The clay flew across the room and it hit my grandfather." she laughs, eyes full of love at the memory.

"Ah, I see you were born a natural." I joke and she playfully squints her eyes at me.

"Well my grandpa has called me Picasso ever since then." she chuckles and so do I.