Gull, I Can't Explain What I Feel

21st FEELS: *THE PAINFUL PAST*

DINDINE'S POV

"GOOD MORNING KAMBAL!"-Elle. Nakahithit na naman ba'to ng katol?

"Hindi naman siguro maganda ang araw mo nyan?" pagtataas ko sakanya ng kilay.

"MAGANDANG-MAGANDA AKO KAMBAL. HAHAHA!" jonginang mahabaging santa.

"Spill it." Napansin niya atang napansin ko ring may kakaiba sakanya kaya-"Liligawan daw ako ni Yeol kambal! Hihi! Nagbike kami kanina tapos naksssjdfshrd;kdpjtitvfv" andami na niyang nakwento, hindi pa nga gising buong diwa ko. Basta ang maliwanag lang sakin...nanliligaw na sa kanya si tenga. Mga malanding higad ang mga ituu! T_____T

"Si Dyo ba hinahanap mo? Nung nakatulog kana kasi pinaalis ko na. Alangan namang makikitulog dito yun. Duh!" she said while flipping her hair. Tungunu, malakas nga tama neto.

As usual, ginawa ko muna yung morning rituals ko bago bumaba. Kailangan ko munang icompose ang sarili ko. I'm sure madami na namang katanungan ang mga dakilang imbestigador ng mansion na'to=____=

Pagbaba ko ng hagdan, may narinig akong strum ng gitara sa Music Room. Nasa may baba lang kasi yung MR kaya dinig na dinig ko.

[Now Playing: Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus]

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

Even if saving you sends me to heaven~

That song...it reminds me of him, my elder brother. I can't control these tears that were running down, those emotions that is unbearable, those past that I can't turn up anymore...

Like I've said before, muntik na'kong mamatay dahil sa car accident. Unfortunately, kuya was the one who saved me and he died.

[Flashback]

"Kuya Ren dalian mo jebal~male-late na'ko sa audition." he was the one who encouraged me to join the singing audition. Dapat siya nga yung mag-aaudition kasi nasa legal age na siya which is 18 years of age pero mas maganda daw kung ako nalang. May talent naman talaga ang pamilya namin. Mommy and Daddy was a stage performer.

"Don't be too excited sis. 5 minutes pa. Hahaha!" at nagawa niya pang magbiro ha? Halos wala na nga akong boses dito dahil kinakabahan na ako eh!

And to ease my nervousness, he turned up the audio player and played the Your Guardian Angel song. It was our favorite song though.

"No matter what Dine, always remember that I'll be here always." he said while looking at me. I just smiled. Alam ko naman yun eh! He was my hero, my idol...my everything.

Nagulat nalang ako nung biglang may bumusina samin na napakalakas. It was a huge truck. Kuya was caught offguard kaya niliko niya agad yung kotse but in dismay, nahulog kami sa may bangin. All I remember is he was holding my hand tightly as he was hugging me then everything went dark.

He is really an angel. I miss him so much.

I was in vain for almost three years. Tulala, malungkot at laging umiiyak. Back then I was thankful to those who cared for me.

"Oh Dine, andiyan ka pala. Halika dito."-Mommy. She was my kuya's bestfriend, isama mo narin si Kyung.

Back then kuya died, I never dare to enter this room and I never sing. Music was a hell for me.