Puppets in Uniform ~~ An Apply Fic

𝔸𝕟𝕕𝕪

TW: Mentions of self-harm, please do not read the italics if it is harmful to your mental health.

I think sometimes there isn't a good reason for something. That there isn't a cause and a effect for every choice and decision.

"Andrea? I'm going out- what the hell are you doing?!" Lucas screamed, and I froze. My nails weren't long- they never had been. But it was easy- too easy to just dig into my skin with them.

My skin was torn, blood coated my fingertips, and my nails looked terrifying.

"Nothing, what were you saying?" I asked, wiping my palms on my jeans. Lucas sniffed, striding forward with his normal confidence. "Lucas..." I echoed, moving my hands away from his own. He was trying to grab them.

"Let me see, please Andrea!" He pleaded, pulling at my hoodie's sleeves. I pulled away, backing up into my wall. My photos shook on their shelves.

"Lucas stop! Just stop! Please!" I was crying, feeling so much guilt. I didn't really know why I did it- why I would hurt myself. "Go out! Do fun stuff! I'll be okay!" I was whimpering- like a child. Lucas wouldn't leave, and just as quickly as I had been scared, embarrassed. I felt mad, mad that he was leaving- that he wasn't, mad that I hadn't fallen apart yet.

"Andrea, you're hurting yourself?" Lucas whispered, taking in the picture of me. But inside, it felt like hot rage boiling up my inside.

"Shut the fuck up Lucas!" I screamed, clenching my fists. "Go run off with some girl to forget your troubles! I'll clean up after you- just to keep this family from falling apart another day!" I heaved, watching him go white with every scream. "Fuck! Just get out!" I finished, my knees giving out once the door shut.

——

The trains whistle blew, marking the first hour of our trip. We were taking a train from Edinburgh to Dublin, once we got there, we were hijacking a car- kidding, Liana would've killed me if that was the plan.

My phone rang, further disrupting my sleepy state. If it hadn't been for the nightmare- I may have felt rested in reality. But I wasn't. That memory was unsettling, and I didn't want to remember that! Lucas had me riled up and it was messing with my head.

"Lia?" I whispered, looking out at the rest of the car. We surprisingly were all to ourselves in here, I think that England is more popular this time of year- not for the weather but for the festival.

She wasn't here. Maybe she was in the food cart? I think that's a thing.

I yawned, covering my mouth with a hand. My gaze went down, and I could feel my stomach- how out of place and uncomfortable it felt. Mom used to press her hand in on it to fix my posture, but I didn't like it- or understand the message she was trying to convey.

"Lia?" I called out this time, hoping my voice might carry to her. No one- at least no one named liana and who I loved very much came into our section. Is that even what it's called? A frown found its way onto my face, and then I remembered the ringing phone.

I glanced down at my phone, checking who had called. But this time it wasn't Lucas, who seemed too stubborn on showing me off to the world. I wish I didn't compare Lucas to Lance, but I did.

Lance, who had offered himself up as a friend and a little brother, whose flamboyant personality hid a shy, prude boy who grew up a little too quickly. For all his sarcasm and pride, he cared about people, and it shown like a star.

Then there was Lucas. He dropped our family when Mom died, turning to girls and crazy experiences to hide his feelings and hurt. He wanted to use our past as a way to boost his acting career.

"Andy?" Lia asked, interrupting my thoughts. I didn't mind it, they weren't positive thoughts. She had two drinks and what looked like pasta. Oh my god it's the ear pasta- I love that shit!

"Sorry- but food!" I replied, still more focused on the food then Lia. She rolled her eyes, handing me the box and drink. It was lemonade.

We chatted for most of the ride- at least when one of us didn't fall asleep. It felt like having a family dinner, and I loved it.

~~~
"I'm gonna be honest, I'm a little lost but it seems like everyone knows where they live." I admitted, looking at the people staring at us. The town was pretty small, and the smell of salt from the ocean was very strong.

Liana nodded, stumbling slightly on the stony path. It was a nice-looking town for the most part. It wasn't like it was bad, but there some pretty clear changes that could be made.

"Wasn't there meant to be a left turn we took?" Liana asked, looking around us for the sign some women mentioned. I shrugged, adjusting my bags. Even though Val had asked us to come, I don't think she was in her right mind when she did.

A lady looked at us, took us in and then walked over. She smiled at us like we were fresh prey- gross.

"Sorry, but are you two lost?" She asked, an accent slithering between her words with a harsher tone then she was using clearly. We both nodded, embarrassed giggles falling from my mouth.

"Yes ma'am, we're looking for our friends house but we're coming from Scotland and just made friends with her there." I explained, feeling out a Scottish accent like I joked about with Lia. She snorted at me, before turning away.

The older woman's eyes widened, and she pointed up the road. A cottage that reminded me vaguely of the Weasley's house in Harry Potter stood of there, smoke curling from a chimney.

"I hope you're not talking about Miss Valerie, if you are, you may want to reconsider her friendship with you both. She's a bad luck charm," the woman advised, waddling away with a slight limp. She turned back, a animal like grin on her face. "And a dyke." The woman added and seemed to be examining our reactions once again.

I dropped my bags, glaring at her. Lia gave me a warning look but was also clenching her hands. I dropped my focus to the woman's legs, picturing them snapping from old age and her slowly turning to nothing.

"Andy no..." Lia whispered, grabbing my shoulder with a very lose grip. Are you trying to make me act out?! God Lia... kidding.

"Do you want to say that again Ma'am?" I asked, glaring at her as much as I could. I couldn't get detention, none of my teachers are here and I don't see any law enforcement.

The woman stalked forward, and it reminded me of Lucas- when he found me hurting myself. I could feel the tingling in my arms like they remembered too.

"She's a Dyke, and I bet you're one too." She hissed, that challenging tone I'd heard from Emily when she had harassed Zaynab reflecting in this woman's voice too.

"Fuck you." I hissed back, punching her in the nose and watching her stumble back onto her butt. This woman's nose didn't bleed but she was shocked, and her face was hilarious.

Me and Lia ran up the road, following a trail lined with wildflowers up the house. The woman's crying for help wasn't answered, and the door stood in front of us with a hostile like aura.