Clairvoyant - Changlix

Content warning/research

This story has religious theming, internalized/direct homophobia, and bible verses and discussions of said verses quoting the NIV version. If this isn't your jam, that is totally okay! I have silly stories in my one-shot book that aren't as serious. Also, this is not assuming Stray Kids' sexuality in any way. It's a fiction story! 

This is also not intended as a pro-homophobia/anti-gay book, but instead an exploration of how religion and verses in the bible directly condemning not sleeping with the same gender can make sense or not make sense in today's world. I wanted to make the struggle less about sex (there are plenty of good Stray Kids smut books out there) and more about loving someone in a 'nontraditional' way, especially in old school church circles. I don't know if I'm going to do a good job of that, but that is my intent with the story.

Instead of looking for apartments because my lease expires at the end of the month, I've been researching this book! Good for the book, but not so good for irl! I wanted to share/update what I looked up as I went along.

One great resource I found was the Geeky Justin Youtube channel. He is an openly gay Christian, whose videos on being as such really helped me build a faith-based perspective on how it's okay to be gay and still have a deep love of God, which is where Felix stands in the book. These were some particularly helpful videos of his:

The Bible and Homosexuality: A Nuanced Approach: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zW5ZZtdziwU

Can You Be Gay and Christian?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBYmbfefWfA

Homosexuality "debate"/discussion about whether the bible allows for gay marriage: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHs2SHdSz_Q

Former leader of most popular gay conversion therapy company in the US (Exodus International) talks with Justin about how it never really worked: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lJQCO8c1cRk

I also looked up directly at some point if the holy spirit is just the placebo effect and found this interesting video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efQH4rwPlZI

There are many mini-series about how being gay and being Christian actively interact, particularly in the American south and/or "bible belt" and stumbled across a series called "Prideland" which you can find here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjGgwxHwFwY&list=PL1mtdjDVOoOqBoTocJnAOnoJKNO-l61S_

I did a bit of research about gay conversion therapy, and remembered a Vice documentary about it I watched several years ago about it. I wanted to internalize the perspective of those who are gay/"same-sex attracted" who don't want to be, and what they might tell themselves along this struggle of two clearly different life paths:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD4sWQG2DnQ

One of the few podcasts I listen to is called "Oh No Ross and Carrie," and they did a two-part show about the "Be My Child" conference back in 2018 that I was always drawn to. This helped shape the Christian adult perspective of being not so keen on Changbin's developing feelings for Felix. It was also just good fun to listen to for a laugh and/or "holy shit, people believe this?" moments: https://ohnopodcast.com/investigations/2018/5/4/ross-and-carrie-and-claire-get-straightened-out-part-1-ex-gay-therapy-edition

There were also videos that were hard for me to watch about people attesting to not being gay anymore, like this one with Becket Cook: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y24l9gX1Bc

This dude straight up says being gay is being broken, and you just have to recover from it.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n078cvLw8I

This is heartbreaking af. A young man named Nathan wants to marry a woman and have kids someday, but the only time he's happy is around his gay friend Cameron: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FO2cWOYkpPg

I've probably watched more than this, but these were the most memorable. I do hope you enjoy the book and go on this journey with me of learning to get past your shit so you can be happy.

-Nicole