'i-i'll change in the bathroom' han said and walked passed minho .
'just don't be too late , i don't think running laps at 8 am sounds very pleasant to both of us' minho said and walked over to the boys' locker room , quickly loosing han from the sight .
'i'm so glad i'm rooming with a boy and not a girl like last time'
'don't be insecure , we're all men at the end of the day'
'i'm non-binary'
minho felt like shit . it was just now starting to hit him how confusing and retracting it should have felt for han to hear those words . fuck . he had to make it up to them somehow because minho truly felt so terrible and just guilty . and he also just really wanted to truly get to know han better and ask some stuff and educate himself about non-binary folks so he was planning on sitting them down and just talking whenever they have time .
'okay , so since everyone is here , present and changed , we'll start . girls , go to that female teacher' mr.Kim pointed to the other side of the gym where the woman was patiently waiting for all the girls to gather . 'and boys , stay with me'
minho immediately looked back to find han , who was standing right behind him , carefully listening to everything that the teacher was saying . han already knew that the P.E is going to be separated for both boys and girls , so they had already had plenty of time to accept the fact that they would be attending with the boys .... and would be seen as one of the boys .
minho didn't know if he should ask the other if they were okay with it , even tho he perfectly knew that , of course han wasn't okay with it .
'han' minho stepped closer .
'm ?' they hummed in response .
'i know it sucks , but hold it in for a bit , okay ?' he wanted to comfort them , but he just didn't know how , since there was no way in changing the school's system .
'y-yeah ...' han appreciated minho trying to help but they knew that the only thing that they could do was to just put their feelings aside for a little bit and just bare with it .
'if you start feeling uncomfortable , just step out for a second or just talk to me . whatever works for you'
'do you think i e-ever feel comfortable tho ?' han let out a mentally tired chuckled .
'i hope you'll start feeling comfortable around me soon'
'i-i hope so too'
'okay , let's start with a warm up !' their conversation was soon cut off by mr.Kim .
P.E went by pretty quickly and it wasn't as bad as han had imagined . don't get me wrong , it was still horrible having people constantly misgendering you , but it was nothing too unbearable , since han was used to it by now . on the other hand , minho kept checking up on them , asking how they were feeling , reassuring that their feelings were valid , trying to distract them if someone had directly called them a boy or just a he in general . it was sweet and it really warmed han's little heart .
'okay you are dismissed now , go change !' mr.Kim announced and the gym was filled with chatter as everyone walked back to the changing rooms .
'what's your next period ?' minho approached han who was slowly walking towards the bathrooms .
'biology , what about y-you ?' han didn't know anyone at the school except for their roommate - minho , so the fact that he was so willing to spend their school time together was oddly cute and comforting .
'english'
'mh' han hummed .
'do you want me to help you find your biology class ?'
'd-do you think i'm a b-baby ?' they scoffed with a light chuckle .
'what's with the attitude now ?' minho laughed a bit as well 'just tryna be nice , you know'
'i appreciate it , but i-i'll find my biology class myself , thank y-you' han kindly smiled and walked away . minho didn't have quite enough of time to return the smile before his roommate was long gone so he just sighted to himself and went into the boys' changing room , a strong smell of sour sweat and just generally -boys - immediately crept up his nostrils making him change even faster so he could be off as soon as possible , not wanting to deal with the grossness of the locker room in the morning .
han quickly changed their clothes and after giving a short look in the mirror , they walked right out , because they just didn't want to be seen in the boys' bathroom . even tho it was so much better than the locker rooms where you would have to get partly naked and have other boys stare up your body that han was so self conscious about , but nonetheless the bathrooms were still uncomfortable and unpleasant .
as soon as they opened the bathroom door , they were met with a typical busy high school setting . all kind of different people were trying to get to all kind of different classes . gosh , i would have to get into this anxious-looking crowd if i want to get to my class on time . han hesitated for a second before stepping one step forward and basically becoming the anxious-looking crowd .
people were way too close to their liking but that's how it always is . just suck it up for a bit .
han felt so relieved when they had finally reached their destination - biology class . the bell rang as soon as they stepped a foot into the classroom , that already had students packed to the fullest , leaving them just a couple of options for seating , which of course meant that no matter where han decided to sit - there will always be someone next to them . so they just walked over to the class very last table and stopped , meeting eyes with a totally gorgeous boy who was sitting beside the empty seat that han was aiming for .
'i-is this s-seat t-taken ?' han stuttered which immediately made them embarrassed , a slightly pinkish color covering their chubby cheeks .
'no' the male answered . han just nodded and carefully sat down next to him , trying to take up as less space as possible , making themselves even smaller .
'i'm jay by the way' he spoke up out of nowhere , startling the other .
'oh' han immediately looked at the said boy and low-key observed his feature 'i'm han'
'nice to meet you han' jay reached out his hand for the smaller to shake , which they immediately accepted .
'n-nice to meet y-y-y' han was growing frustrated as it's always the same fucking word that gives them such a hard time 'y-you too' they finally blurred out. 'i'm s-sorry about my speech problems' han decided to address it now so it wouldn't be too awkward if they just couldn't answer something fast or anything like that .
'don't worry about it' jay smiled .
a/n : lately i've been on a little writing block , but i think i'm good now ! how are y'all doing ? good ?
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his throat was raw | minsung
Fanfictionalways wanted everyone to like me, when i didn't even like myself. like an empty can - you're just loud. tw : - detailed sh - sa - ed - drug abuse - suicidal thoughts - homophobia - self hatred