The Safe Wizards

24: Reflections

Charlie sighed as he left the nursery at the reservation. The little dragons he was to take back to Romania would be ready to travel two days later. That meant he would be leaving Alaska the next day. He had told Harry that he would check back with him before he left to tell him what he wanted to do with their relationship. The problem was that he didn't know what he wanted. He had been really hurt by all the revelations, especially the fact that Harry knew things were going on all along and had never told him.

Charlie took off his dragon jacket, greeted his colleagues and decided to walk rather than take the express cart to the apparition area. He took advantage of the hour-long walk by the light of his wand and the moon to think about his situation with Harry. Aside from his doubts and the situation his boyfriend had kept from him, there was the fact that he had two potential soul mates, that he knew them both and that he had confessed to him that he was in love with them both. Knowing that Harry loved someone other than himself really hurt Charlie and scared him. He had to be honest with himself, he shuddered at the thought of letting Harry out of his life. The young man had taken a central place in his life in a very short time and Charlie couldn't imagine his future without him. On the other hand, could he leave Alaska knowing that his boyfriend would continue to hang out with this other man and get to know him? Could he stand to be thousands of miles away from the one who matched him knowing he was being courted by another? Another one he had also fallen in love with. He knew his bond with Harry would break if he ever just kissed the other one, he was sure he would feel it... which didn't stop him from dreading it happening. If he decided to give their relationship a chance, he was going to spend the next few months in anguish, could he handle it?

Could he really imagine leaving Harry in the next few days? He tried to imagine breaking up with the dark-haired man. Apart from the pain of the idea, there were advantages to this decision. It would allow him to leave this love triangle and to be master of his destiny. It would allow him to stop putting Harry, Teddy and Andromeda in danger every time he wrote to him or came to see him. He would no longer have to lie to his family and friends. He would not suffer while waiting for a decision that he could not imagine would be in his favor. His bond with Harry was fragile compared to the one he shared with the vampire, that was obvious. The chances of Harry choosing him were slim to none, and he knew he would wonder for the rest of his life if the dark-haired man would regret his choice. Would Harry make a rational choice, thinking that the vampire would have a chance to be happy later with someone else as opposed to him? Would he choose him only so he wouldn't hurt him and condemn him to a life without Love?

Charlie huffed again, he had just arrived at the apparition area and had not come to any decision. Stopping wasting time, he apparated to his brother's house. There was a strange tension in the house. Fleur was sitting in the living room with a book in her hand, but it was obvious that she was not reading, something was bothering her. She had her stormy eyes turned to him to which Charlie responded with a questioning look.

"Ask your brother," she threw her voice full of reproach, "It's not my place to tell you. In the kitchen."

The dragon rider nodded, preferring to say nothing more so as not to risk further angering the mistress of the house. He went to the room mentioned and found his brother leaning on the sink, his eyes lost in the window, his shoulders and back tense.

"Hi...?" began Charlie, knowing that when his brother was like this it wasn't always a good idea to disturb him.

"Hi," Bill replied in a strained voice.

"What's going on?"

"I'm sorry, Cha," the older man whispered without looking at him. "I went to see Harry."