Broken Promises

Chapter 10

Sophie smiled the entire way home on the train, she was pretty sure everyone in the carriage thought she was crazy, she kept trying to stop herself, technically she had just cheated on her husband and she should have felt guilty as hell, but she felt alive. She brushed her fingers against her lips as she retraced Will's lips on hers as if it was a beautiful dream she had. Even the delay in Reading didn't dampen her mood, but by the time the train pulled into the station in Winchester, guilt was starting to gnaw at her edges. Stuart picked her up from the station and as she climbed into the car, she prayed that the perfume she had spritzed on the way out covered any lingering trace of Will's scent.

'HE kissed me, HE kissed me,' she told herself it quickly becoming a mantra. Stuart beeped the car horn, causing Sophie to jump, she climbed into the car.

'Hey sweetheart, how was it?' Stuart asked her planting a kiss on her cheek,

'It was amazing she sold nearly every photograph and has loads of work offers from it, I'm so proud of her,' she replied, quelling a wave of nauseating guilt,

'That's great, you hungry?' he asked,

'Starving' lied Sophie, the tingle of vinegar still on her tongue from the chips,

'Good I defrosted some lasagne,' Stuart replied, Sophie smiled at her husband,

'Lovely,', they spent the rest of the short journey in silence, Sophie stared out of the window watching the trees whizz past.

That night in bed Sophie couldn't sleep, Stuart slept soundly next to her, gentle snores breaking out between deeper breathes, it was irritating her. The events of the day flitted back and forth across her mind, the show, the kiss, those eyes, but it was more than that with Will. She had felt a real connection with him, and she hadn't smiled so much in such a long time.

'What if he never messages me,' she thought, suddenly acutely aware that she may never hear from him ever again. The thought stung, and tears pricked at her eyes,

'Technically I cheated on my husband though, but no HE kissed me, yes, I kissed him back, but it was a moment of madness, who wouldn't in that situation?' she thought, too many things swirling in her mind. She sat herself up in bed, no longer content lying down,

'Should I tell Stuart?' she pondered the answer for a long time,

'He kissed me it wasn't my fault, but I didn't stop it, well I did but not soon enough, if I tell him it will just hurt him and the likelihood of me ever hearing from him again is zilch,' tears pricked again,

'No, I can't tell him, not yet anyway, if the conversation occurs maybe,' she chewed on a nail, staring over at her husband she couldn't help twiddling with the silver band of her wedding ring,

'But what if he does message me? I can be friends with a man, it's perfectly possible for a man and a woman to be friends and there be no funny business, but I can't exactly meet up with him can I? Urgh,' a car pulled into the close outside, casting semi-circles of light across the tops of the curtains, the changing colours and tones across the ceiling made her think of Van Goghs Starry night. She stared at Stuart, married 7 years, they had been together for nearly 10,

'No, I have to forget about Will, I don't want to but I have to,' the realisation of how far the pair of them had drifted recently hit her,

'I have to concentrate on my marriage, Will just simply reminded me that we've let things slide recently, I've let so much slide, I don't paint, I hardly ever pick up a book, just fester in front of the Tv and wait for Stuart to get home,'

Van Gogh continued to swirl in her mind, the blue, yellow swirls of the painting morphing into Monet's Waterlilies in bloom,

'I've never seen a Monet in real life,' she pondered wistfully, she had wanted to go to Paris for their 5th wedding anniversary, to visit Le Orangerie, but Stuart couldn't get the time off as usual.