Lost Love

Chapter 11

I was still coming to terms with my feelings. It's been two days since I was in hospital. Beth and Chloe have moved in, with Keira coming over everyday. I loved them being there but it has began to made me feel suffocated. I think they're scared to leave me alone. I haven't talked to them all properly so I brought them into the sofa for a chat.

"I decided to get this out of the way as quickly as possible. I've struggled with my mental health for a long time now. I used to self harm regularly but got in under control. Leah cheating on me with Lucy set me over the edge. I feel like i'm not good enough for anyone and I shouldn't be here anymore."

Beth grabbed my hand as I carried on.

"I just want yous to know that I am safe. I wouldn't leave yous by yourselves. To be honest I don't think yous would cope with the daily chores."

I saw smiles appear on all three girls faces.

"Thank you for being there though. I really appreciate it. I love you all so much."

"We love you Holl. Please don't do that again. We don't want you to go anywhere. We care about you too much."
Beth said, pulling me in for a hug. Keira spoke, with tears in her eyes.

"Do you think your ready to talk to Leah? Just for some closure?"

"I think i'm going to ask her over soon."

"We're all so proud of you Holl. We're not ready to lose you yet. You stay strong for us?"
Chloe said, tears falling down her face.

"I will girls. I promise I won't leave yous three yet."

I left the room to text Leah.

Leah

Me(Holly)
I think we need to talk. Come over today if your free please.

Leah
I'll be over soon. Thank you for wanting to talk x

I sat on my bed, watching Friends. It calmed me down a lot, it always has. Ever since I was a child, it was the one constant in my life that would bring me a small amount of joy. There was a knock at my door.

"Come in."

Leah appeared in the door frame.

"Hi Holl.. Are you okay?"

"So i'm guessing you heard?"

"Yes of course I did. You blocked me so I guessed you didn't want me at the hospital."

"Look Leah we need to talk. I need an explanation to what happened. If this is the end, I need closure."

"I promise Holl I had a reason. Lucy came over to me when I was at the bar. She told me she could get you back whenever she wanted to. I got mad and hit her. Lucy said if I didn't kiss her, she'd kiss you and convince you to get back together with her. Look, I was scared because yous have two years of history. She could take you back whenever. I didn't want to lose you but I didn't realise it would end up like this. I promise Holl."

"The pain you caused me was more than anything I've ever experienced. Why couldn't you tell me this? Instead of kissing her?"

Leah had started crying. I held her hand.

"I was drunk. I know that doesn't give me a pass but I didn't want her to kiss you. What if you kissed her and remembered all the memories. The connection. But I didn't realise what you had been through before. The pain it would've caused you. I promise Holl. I didn't mean for you to end up in hospital."

"I think you should go. I need to talk to Lucy. I'll text you when i've spoke to Lucy okay?"

Leah walked out of the room, tears now flowing from her face.

POV: Leah

I made her not want to be here. I made her try take her own life. How am I meant to live with that? I need her back. I want to marry her.

Beth was in the kitchen. She gave me a hug, which was unexpected.

"I know you didn't mean it. Once she talks to Lucy, she'll see what Lucy is like now. She just needs to do that herself. All you can do is be supportive."

"Thanks Beth. You listening in?"

"Of course I was. I don't want anything else happening to Holly. She delicate right now. I'm just keeping her safe."

"Thank you. Please keep doing it until I'm allowed to get close to her again?"

"I will Leah. Don't worry."

I got in my car and drove off. I couldn't stop crying. I drove past the hospital and parked in the car park. It felt like I've lost her. I can't loose her. She's too precious to me. I need to get her back.

End of POV

I texted Lucy. I need to hear it from her part.

Lucy

Me(Holly)
What went down at the club? Why did you threaten Leah?

Lucy
She doesn't deserve you. You told me to move on. I can't okay? If I can't have you why can't I take away your new person. You need to realise that you need me. You can't live without me. It's me you should be marrying.

I stared at my phone in awe. Was Leah right? And why was Lucy talking like that? I never replied to her. I couldn't find any words to say to Lucy. But I knew a few I need to say to Leah.