How Could Cupid be so Cruel - Elmax

6. A Terrible Fear Encroaching, That I'll Never Love A Boy

T/W ABUSE

I was already late and would be given out to regardless so I decided to get some answers from the one person I thought could help, I headed for the video store. Once I arrived it was empty except a tall dirty blonde women with many rings on her fingers and black nails that had started chipping off.

"Hey Robin, your gay right?" I asked while approaching the counter and leaning on it.

"how do you know did Steve tell you?" she says under her breath while pulling me closer incase anyone walks in, with a worried expression on her face.

"No Steve didn't tell me." I told the tall blonde with a chuckle.

"Then how do you know, cause I didn't tell you?" she asked starting to panic.

"Robin nobody else knows don't worry. I just figured it out I mean have you seen a mirror lately." I say while gesturing to her clothes and jewellery.

"Yeah I guess but why did you come in here saying that straight away are you gonna out me?" She asks while furrowing her eye brows.

"No, no don't worry I have some questions actually about, well how you knew?" I ask while looking up at her with a worried expression.

"Awww a baby gay, does this mean your my child know and not Steve's?" she says while leaning her head on her hands with a big dumb smile.

"I'm not.. Well I don't know just ansewer the question." I stammer starting to get annoyed.

"Well it's different for everyone but for me at least I was sitting in a class and I was bored so I started writing my feelimgs about a girl I wanted to be 'friends' with down on some paper and also how I wanted to go to France with her and all the stuff we would do, once the bell went I threw it in the bin making sure I hadn't written any names down, but I didn't land in the bin it landed by one of the popular girls desks and she picked it up and read it to her friends while I was listening in and instantly they all thought it was for her written by a boy and that it was some declaration of love, and once they had said that I realised that I felt more then friendship for this girl." Robin stated looking down at me waiting to see my reaction.

"Okay... I think I get it, so I could try to recreate this event and see what they think when they read it out." I said in a questioning tone.

"I suppose that could work. Just make sure you don't use names and maybe switch up your writing style a bit." Robin says proud of herself for helping me.

"Alright thanks Rob but I gotta go like right now so I'll see you around." I say not waiting for a response I rush out the door and start to skate home as fast as I can.

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I go up to the front door knowing he's waiting for me. I open it slowly and walk through.

" Your late!" Neil says in a furious tone

" I know I'm sorry it won't happen again." I quickly say knowing it won't change anything.

"Funny cause that's what you said last time and you know what I do when you lie to me Maxine!" he sates getting more and more furious by the second.

I want to scream a shout for him not to but I know it won't change anything he'll just hit harder if I do so I walk up to him slowly and I feel a large hand slam my body into a wall a tear falls down my cheek as I know what comes next he starts slapping me and punching me until I fall to the ground and then he starts kicking me repeatedly until I'm bruised and beaten enough for one night.

"THAT WILL TEACH YOU NOT TO DISOBEY ME AGAIN!" He yelled as he walked away from me and back to the couch to finish his beer.

I run upstairs tears running down my cheeks staining them and I lie down on my bed knowing that if I am gay and Neil or Billy find out these bruises will get a thousand times worse and there will be more then just bruising I just lie in my bed until I feel myself drifting into unconsciousness.

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I wake up on Monday morning the plan formulated in my head. All I did on Saturday was think of the plan I didn't even eat which I was regretting now I had an awful stomachache so I threw on a forest green pullover hoodie with a palm-tree and sunset design on the front in white I then put a blue flannel over the hoodie and also put on some black jeans and a pair of green suede vans, then rushed downstairs to grab a bowl of cereal ate it quickly not wanting to deal with my family this morning and rushed out the door on my skateboard and headed for school.

The whole time when I was skating to school I was going over the plan in my head, I had already written out the letter not wanting to risk doing it in class, it would never be detectable as my hand writing and it was in blue pen aswell when I only ever use black, there were no names anywhere, it was the perfect letter. As I walked into school I looked around at all the people gossiping about something stupid usually this would make me want to leave right away but today I actually wanted to be in school it was the only place that my plan could work. I waited till my first class with the whole party which was English, I barley payed attention to the teacher as English was my best subject and I didn't need any thing to distract me from the plan. Finally the bell rang signalling lunch so I quickly got up and discreetly rolled the note under El's desk nobody saw everything was great I walked up to the party after gathering my stuff to talk to them on our way to the cafeteria like I normally would. Just as we were about to leave the class Dustin noticed the note picked it up and waved it in the air handing it to El.

"Look what I found under your desk El, looks like you have a secret admirer." The curly haired boy said with a goofy smile on his face.

Everyone gathered around El as she started to read the note talking about how I feel a strange feeling in my stomach when we are around each other, how everytime we brush hands from reaching for the same book in the library I feel a fire in my hand and how I can't help but stare into your chocolate brown eyes and every now and again take a glance at your perfect pink lips wondering how soft they are.

"Yeah that's definatly not for me it must not have rolled to the acctual desk nobody could think of me in that way." El claimed handing the paper back to Dustin.

"If that was meant for you I swear I'm gonna kill whoever sent it!" Mike said furiously his face red with anger. We couldn't help but laugh at him hee looked so dumb fists clenched talking about how he'd kill someone even though if you threw an apple at him it could knock him out, the laughter seemed to calm him down a bit and we started walking to the cafeteria still talking about who the note could be from while El denies it was even for her. All the stuff they say just confirms it for me as I walk at the back of the group I start to zone out wondering what this means I can't let anyone know and defiantly not my family. I start to breath heavily as I come to the one fact of it all I'm gay

Authors notes
Hope you enjoyed this chapter this will be a slow burner and I am going to start adding a couple short chapters every now and then just to go further into the emotions and stress of it all. Best wishes

-Elmax fantasy