PLAY THE PART | mileven

twenty nine

as the days passed after the break up, the hollowing ache inside her heart merged into something far more numbing.

it started to feel like something comparable to a toothache — striking only every once in a while but when it does, it's such pain that you think you won't ever get rid of.

one glance at blooming daisies on the fields, a certain smell or a certain word were enough to trigger that pain. it almost seems inescapable to her.

seeing el fall into moments of melancholy and spotting how different she is ever since she called it quits with mike, max convinced her to join a couple people from their architectural history class for a meet up that they planned on friday after classes.

she was reluctant at first but nevertheless gave in for max.

the issue now was that el was with a group of mostly unknown people at the roller disco while max was missing — she texted el that she caught a cold and won't be able to make it there.

it left el all alone with people she barely ever interacted with. only some faces were vaguely familiar to her but others did she see for the first time in her entire life.

even though she didn't shy away from meeting new people and getting to know them, it kind of did feel awkward that she knew none of them really. she felt out of place.

they were engaged in some type of conversation while walking towards a big booked seating booth while el slowed down her steps and started looking at them from afar.

this was stupid.

she didn't feel welcomed with these people, she didn't even want to be here in the first place.

especially not when this particular place was making her mind flood with memories that she didn't need to remember. memories of her first date with mike, memories of their first kiss.

her attraction towards him started to develop itself here until it grew into something she wasn't prepared to.

yeah, fuck that. she needs to leave.

as she started taking steps away to leave the roller disco, dustin's voice hit her ears and made her stop her tracks. "el." he warmly said and she recognized his voice instantly.

she turned to look at him, there was a gentle expression on his face as he walked closer towards her with open arms. she welcomed herself in a hug by him and squeezed her eyes shut at the familiarity.

"it's so good seeing you." he said when he pulled away. there was a sad smile on his face and she tried her hardest not to be affected by it. "how are you doing?"

terrible. miserable. all numb.

"fine." she said with a tight smile etching over the delicate features of her face. "all fine, you know.."

he nodded his head. "yeah, mike told us." compassion quickly flashed over his blue eyes. "it was pretty.. unexpected but i hope that we're still friends?"

"of course we are." she instantly said and placed her hand on his arm. "everything is fine, don't worry about that."

"that's good to hear." he smiled again, pausing for a second. "so, who are you here with? or did you come alone?"

she pointed towards the door with her thumb. "i was actually just about to leave."

"leave where?" lucas suddenly showed up behind dustin. "sorry for just barging into the conversation. hi, el."

"hi lucas." she replied. "i wanted to go home and check on max on the way to see if she needs anything — she caught a cold."

"i saw her today already, don't worry, she's okay — i think she's actually taking a nap right now." he said before gesturing towards a free booth. "why won't you stay a little longer? we haven't seen each other in a while."