Forever Alone... Or Not

Chapter 22

3rd Person

He never meant to hurt you.

He doesn't love you.

You can't love someone who does that.

He's your soulmate.

He only wants you for what you can give him.

He was made for you.

Was his love fake?

You both made mistakes.

He never loved you.

Why would he do that?

You can't live without him.

How can I love a monster?

Leave him.

Nicco paced in his lonesome, unaware Michael was doing the same. They had chased away their friends in panic and frustration of the night ahead. The girls could do nothing but watch as the men destroyed themselves mentally. The voices berating back and forth didn't help.

These men, when starting their relationship, did not expect it to end in utter turmoil. Michael finally thought something good happened to him. He found someone who seemed to care. Seemed to love him despite the lack of love he had for himself. Nicco was in a very similar mental state. He didn't like his family for a reason. The reason valid. Just as valid as Michael's reason for hating his own father. Nicco didn't have a choice about what he was, but he did have a choice about who he loved. From the crush he had in second grade till now, Nicco chose Michael. Now he fears he will continue to choose him over and over again with no thought of self-preservation. The word "toxic" could briefly give one an idea of their relationship. But, it wasn't enough. Cosmic damnation seemed appropriate.

They were so tangled together. Every blood vessel, every neuron, every atom chased, begged, longed for the other. When you die your atoms leave, and become something new, over and over. They could only be tangled in such a way if they had been together multiple times before, in their past lives. Maybe the Moon Goddess wasn't mistaken when she paired these two? Maybe she had done it time and time again. Did their past lives live happily? Or did they live a cliche Wattpad love story as well? Was this one supposed to be a failure? To discontinue the eternal connection? It's probably best that happens.

"I should talk to him like Bethany suggested? Right? Should I? But...he-he. No, I can't. No."

"I can trust him right? He didn't choose this. Nicco didn't mean for this to happen. I didn't mean for this to happen. We...fuck."

Both trembled at their thoughts and cried at their words. As much as they wanted away from each other, they needed each other. Once again, the atoms needed one another. Once again, blood bonds, soulmates-whatever you want to call them– need one another. It almost was like something was controlling Nicco when he rushed out of his room to find Michael.

For the first time, while being back in the castle, he ignored the red halls that resembled all the blood that's been spilled here. The blood resembled the monsters his family created; The widows and orphans they left behind in their megalomaniac rage.

Nicco willed someone to stop him. Someone. Something. Anyone. Anything. To stop him. Stop this everlasting fight of destiny and choice. Of love and hate. Of him and happiness. It felt wrong. His skin grew moist, sticking to his parents' black and pretentious clothes. It made his skin crawl.

One more hall. He's so close. I can hear him breathe. Feel his heartbeat. My skin is tingling already. Goddess, I need him.

The next hall was like the last, and the one before that. There were only a few small changes that indicated Nicco was in the right hallway. The main one was the blatant "stay out" sign that still decorated the door to his old room. He didn't know why his family hadn't taken it down after he left. He was glad it was still there, for comfort and navigation reasons.