The Billionaire Throuple

Nehemiah Jones

After we got chow, Sammy took us back to his place. He looked at my ride, gave me a jump and now I'm off to meet Mom and Scooter. I guess the battery was dead. Whelp, cross that off my list of shit to worry about.

I dunno how to feel about the three of us, but I think it can work. I'm gonna give it a shot. I don't see any downside, except now as I'm cruising on home. In the back of my mind, I'm thinking about them two rolling around, getting busy. Actually, it ain't a bad thought.

I ain't gonna let it bother me. Just 'cause they like each other doesn't mean they don't like me. I should be all smiles since I already liked them both. I, for sure, thought I was 'bout to be let go. After all the trouble I done caused Sammy, I couldn't be mad if he did and Andreas? I was surprised as hell when he went for it, much less, made it about the three of us.

It's probably 'cause they need me. I bet Sammy is weak on offense, which wouldn't mean shit to me, but in the long run, it'd have Andreas off locking up draft picks. Yeah, so matter fact, I'm good. I'm gonna chill and enjoy this.

I get my ride parked in the lot and head into the building. It's a red, brick complex with black steel sections where they got balconies and at each corner where they got floor high windows. It's one of about twenty-some identical, six-high complexes around a pond, but you can't see a lick of water from mine.

I live on the fifth floor, but I always take the steps. I can't be waiting on the elevator. I hear about them mugs breaking down too often. I dunno how many times, but once is enough. Besides, running is good for me. I gotta stay in shape if I'm gonna be carrying this relationship on my back.

For real though, I bet Andreas is the only one who got experience, but his relationships never last long. That's another reason I'm sticking this out. He'll probably get bored. I've seen too many new faces pop up on his Instagram, then 'page not found' the next week.

This could be what he needs though, maybe it'll be good for all of us. I'm gonna chill like I said, but let's just say, I ain't bringing him home to Mom anytime soon. Shit, I didn't even think about that. Do I bring both of them? Mom's been good with a lot, but that's gonna be an awkward ass dinner talk.

I get to the top of the steps, but I ain't there yet. Our unit could be the halfway line of the hall, so there ain't no short way about it, except being short one floor from the top means we got surround sound for arguments.

And it's prime time tonight.

Below us, it's too many kids in the house and above, they're always stomping and slamming doors, go figure, right? On one side, new parents. On the other, sports fanatics. They wouldn't be too bad if they watched more than one sport, but since it's football, my ears can't quit perking up.

Other than that, it's really not too bad living out here. It's a three-bed for the three of us, Ma, me and Scoot. It's got laundry rooms on every level, no pests, drugs or violence—that I know of and people mostly keep to themselves.

I take one step into the front room and I can already smell Ma's cooking. She made green bean casserole with mac-n-cheese and I can't wait to get a plate. People try to tell me those two don't go, but it's my favorite and Ma be throwing down hard in the kitchen.

I say, "Ma, I'm home," and start working on that plate.

The food is still hot, so it couldn't have been out long. We always have dinner whenever she gets home from her shift. I can cook and I do whenever she's not in the mood, but she likes to have us all sit down for a meal when we can. I ain't complaining 'cause a lot people don't get that. If I had to bring one over, out of Sammy and Andreas, it'd be Sammy for that reason.

Ma sneaks up like a ninja and hugs me from behind while I'm scooping mashed potatoes onto my plate. "Baby, I'm so proud of you!" I'm smiling hard. I don't feel embarrassed at all. Even though my grade isn't as good as Andreas's, I still get high off her approval. "You got that grade up, just like you said you would."

"Yeah, I worked hard for this one and it's gonna be the same here on out," I say.

She lets me go and I set my food down at the table. The stove ain't but five long steps to the dining room. It's not like Sammy's where you need a map and golf cart. If I lived there I'd work up an appetite going back and forth. It'd be an endless cycle. I don't know he does it.

He doesn't, that's why he's so damn skinny.

I sit down as Scooter is creeping up to go in on the casserole again. He says, "When you gonna tell your man to put us up on IG?"

I take a quick bite of food to buy time, but my face is feeling extra warm. He thinks he's just teasing, but now I gotta worry about Ma. Like clockwork, her head moves on a swivel toward me and her fist goes straight to that damn hip. "When were you gonna tell me you were seeing someone?"

I chew my food slowly, but she's staring, waiting. I ain't sure what I'm gonna say, but I don't ever lie to her. Okay, sometimes I don't tell her the whole truth, but I don't be telling bold faced lies.

"Huh?" she asks. I'm smiling. I dip my spoon to go for another bite, but she slaps my hand. "Come on now, I got a right to know who my boy is spending time with."

Scooter is cracking up behind her. He could tell her himself any time, but that's how he is. He likes to have me here sweating.

"It's still new, Ma," I say, shaking my head, "I don't wanna jinx it. Give it a week, ight?"

Mom nods and starts letting up, so I breathe again. Scooter turns his phone toward her and says, "It's him, SantiAndi." Of course, he does.

"Ight, next time you're wondering why nobody wanna take your a—ct to school" —I point to the floor— "think of now, then you'll know."

I watch as Ma looks at his phone. I can't believe he still has it up, but it's too late now. She's making mental notes. She's probably gonna boot up the old desktop—after blowing through two cans of air—start up an IG and click on every picture.

She'll have one of them big magnifying glasses attached to her head. Maybe even one of them hardhats with the lights on them. I swipe at his phone 'cause they're giggling together.

"Enough, Okay. Chill."

I'm really glad they didn't say anything about Sammy 'cause I ain't ready to get into all that. Then again, who looks at a picture of three people and says, 'oh, must be a throuple'?

"Alright, we won't jinx it. I'll give you your week, but damn, at least you got taste." Ma does this imitation of what I can only assume is how men catcalled back in her day. "I see you. He's handsome!"

My face warms again. I know she's trying to be supportive, but now I'm really embarrassed. It's funny though. When I came out to her, I thought it was gonna be a big deal. She just said, "At least now I don't gotta worry about you being a dead beat daddy."

I know she was kidding 'cause she wants grand kids, but it made me smile. She's been Team Nemo since day one, football or not.