Sebastian Stan Imagines

Bucky Barnes - wish u were gay

A/n: This one is a little different, you aren't dating Bucky. This was inspired by the song "wish u were gay" by Billie Eilish, so all the credits go to her.

Summary: Basically, Bucky rejected you saying you're not his type, so you wrote a song called "wish u were gay", and performed it (link above.)

Italic is the flashback on how you wrote it, regular is the performance.

'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'

"'Baby I don't feel so good,'" You sang, the crowd cheering and roaring your name. "'6 words you never understood. 'I'll never let you go' 5 words you'd never say.' I laugh alone like nothing's wrong."

You laughed quietly to yourself, imagining you saying "Baby I don't feel so good" to him and him caring for you. "I'll never let you go", wishing he'd say those words to you.

"4 days have never felt so long," You sang again. "If 3's a crowd and 2 is us, 1 slipped away."

4 days since Bucky rejected you, and the week has been so slow, probably because the Compound was quiet.

"I just wanna make you feel okay," You sang. "But all you do is look the other way."

Trying to get Bucky's attention by doing anything, he looked away from you, avoiding contact, avoiding almost everything you did.

"I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay," You sang. "I just kinda wish you were gay."

"God dammit Bucky," You thought. "I wish you were gay so I wouldn't have to deal with all this sorrow."

"Is there a reason we're not through?" You sang. "Is there a 12th step just for you? Our conversations all in blue, 11 heys. 10 fingers tearing out, my hair. 9 times you never made it there. I ate alone at 7 you were 6 minutes away."

You pulled at your hair, curing at yourself for being so stupid. Why would Bucky like you back? You were just an ordinary girl. He should've joined you for dinner. He should've said "sorry" and continued talking to you. Not ghost you.

"How'm I supposed to make you feel okay?" You sang. "When all you do is walk the other way. I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay, mm. I just kinda wish you were gay!"

"WISH YOU WERE FUCKING GAY!" You yelled at yourself.

"To spare my pride..."

"I wish I was just happy!"

"To give your lack of interest, an explanation,"

"At least give me a reason, Bucky, please!"

"Don't say I'm not your type!"

"You're not my type," Bucky said.

"Just say that I'm not your preferred sexual orientation," 

"I just...don't think it'd work out," Bucky said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I'm so selfish,"

"So selfish," You thought, leaving him.

"But you make me feel helpless, yeah,"

"But I feel so helpless," You thought, biting your bottom lip so the tears wouldn't explode from your eyes.

"And I can't stand another day," You sang. "Stand another day."

"I can't keep doing this," You thought. "Living, feeling helpless. Something's gotta change. I gotta change. I can't stand this."

"I just wanna make you feel okay," You sang. "But all you do is, look the other way," Cheers erupted from the pause. "I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay, mm. I just kinda wish you were gay. I just kinda wish you were gay! I just kinda wish you were gay."

-Bucky's POV-

"Ohh," Steve said, shaking his head, smiling as he watched Y/n finish her performance from the TV. "Bucky, my friend, you fucked up."