Sebastian Stan Imagines

Sebastian Stan - I Wanna Be Okay

Summary: Y/n wants to feel okay.

Warnings: Fluff <3, timelines inaccurate.

Based off the song "Prom Queen" by Beach Bunny

First Person POV, because I'm currently writing a book that uses first person and I'm just used to that now xD

•••

I haven't felt good about myself since I was a Freshman in high school.

And I don't know why. I felt completely fine about myself up until then. And ever since, I've been a complete mess. And as much as I love my husband, Sebastian Stan, I feel like I'm not enough for him. I feel like I could be better.

Right now, I was sprawled out on the king size bed, reading a magazine. It wasn't one of those model magazines, it was a Rolling Stones magazine.

One of my favorite bands, Beach Bunny, just released a new song called "Prom Queen", and the lyrics were placed into the magazine.

I was scanning over the lyrics, and I hated how much I felt like I could relate to them. Sebastian wouldn't be happy with me.

I laid my chin onto the bed, closing my eyes and taking some breaths. 

I thought this insecurity junk would disappear. Why does it have to destroy my life? I want it to all end-I'm sick and tired of it.

I grabbed a marker from my desk, writing some quotes next to the lyrics that said "I'm beautiful" "No matter what I will always be beautiful" "You're pretty" and so and so.

I smiled at myself, feeling confident.

I then made my way to the kitchen, turning on the miniature TV to grab myself some afternoon cereal (don't ask.)

Some celebrity was talking, and I didn't really pay any attention to it, until I heard my name.

"Yeah, Y/n Stan just isn't it," The Celebrity said. "I mean-Sebastian could do so much better. Like, hello? We have so much more better woman out here. Notice us!"

I dropped the bowl of cereal in my hands, tears threatening to stream down my cheeks.

Thank God Sebastian wasn't home, or he would freak out.

I ran back to the magazine, scanning to the lyrics and crossing out words from the quotes, replacing "I'm beautiful" to "I'm ugly", "No matter what I will always be beautiful" to "No matter what I will always be broken", "You're pretty" to "You're pretty ugly".

Tears were then streaming down my cheeks, sobs escaping my throat.

I threw myself onto the pillows, trying to silence my sobs. Although I thought no one was here, until I heard the front door open and I sat up.

"Y/n!" Sebastian called out, and I quickly grabbed the magazine and tried to run to my dresser to hide it, but Sebastian had walked right into the room, stepping in front of me. 

He stared into my red eyes, a frown forming onto his perfect lips.

"Are you alright?" He asked, reaching a hand up to tangle it into my hair as I leaned into his touch.

I stayed quiet, my hand loosening as I forgot I was holding the magazine, before it dropped to the ground.

We both peered down to look at it, and Sebastian bent down to pick it up, opening the pages and finding the writing.

"Oh Y/n," Sebastian whispered.

"I'm sorry!" I cried out. "I tried to stop myself-but I couldn't! Because this Celebrity was talking crap about me, saying I-I wasn't g-good enough for y-you and I'm sorry I-I can't give y-you what you w-want but it's n-not my f-fault-"

"Shh," Sebastian whispered, placing the magazine down and wrapping me into his embrace. "Everything will be okay."

"Are...are you gonna leave me?" I asked, looking up at the Romanian, and his eyes were suddenly filled with fear, worry, and concern.

"Oh, doll," Sebastian muttered. "I would never leave you. Why would I do that?"

"Because I can't give you what you want!" I sobbed.

"You've already gave me what I want," Sebastian said, with a smile. "You allowed me to love you. And that's all I want."

A smile cracked onto my lips, as I nuzzled into his chest.

"I wanna be okay, Sebastian," I muttered, and his grip on me tightened.

"You will be okay," Sebastian said. "We're in this together, okay? Never forget that, Y/n. I love you. Forever and always."

•••

God I feel like this was horrible, but hope you guys are doing alright! <3

My first year in high school...(Freshman)...and I'm so done with it already, even though it's only been 4 days, smh.