Freezing - Unfreezing

41 | Body and Soul

-I don't even know why I wanted to have a coffee!
She said crying, looking at me.

-It's okay.

-No it's not..
Her phone started flashing up.

-My dad..

-Dad?
She said answering the phone making sound like a hello.

-Am good.
I heard her lying and made me wonder how can someone believes her with a painful voice like this. How can her own father believe her?

-Oh. Okay. For how long?
I have no idea what they are talking about, but I'm sure she is disappointed.

-Yeah dad, I will be fine. Love you too.
She says and put the phone back to the table. If she means anything on this, is the part the she loves him.

-I guess I will watch the "Home Alone" again, alone for one week.
She comments sarcastic and stands up.

-I will go to the toilet.
She says and leaves. I know she is going so she can cry alone. Why does she needs to hide crying about it more from me? It's like she wants to cover up that her dad is an asshole or something. Every time we tried to reach him from the school, was always busy.
Even though she opened up to me one day, now she seems she regretted that.
She is been missing more that a minute; and I know that because I was counting.

No Jasper, you won't go check on her. That will look more weird to her and she needs some time alone. She may calls her boyfriend, but then I check on the table and I see that she left her phone here.
Why didn't she reach him up?
They broke up??
Not that is an easy thing to announce.. I guess she needs her time. Am not asking her about him.
It's been more than ten minutes and she still didn't show up.
Now I'm worrying; a lot.
I took her phone and went to look for her.
Thanks god the women restroom door was open, so the other doors in. Hayley wasn't in there. I felt a really weird pain in my heart.

Where the hell is she??
Where did she go??
I left a cash for the bill and ran out of the cafe.
God, she is sitting on a bench before the parking.

-Hayley??
She turned her head. Of course she were crying,

-You scared me.
I said and sat next to her.

-Just tell me when you need to have some time alone.. Okay?
I didn't want to make her feel bad about that too but I couldn't hide either how much I worried.

-Am sorry..
She said without even looking at me. I don't need to get inside of her head right now to see how much she overthinks. She is shaking and I am not sure if she is cold or just scared.
She was wearing a white Tshirt with jean. I was wearing a black tshirt with a jacket on.
I took my jacket off leaving myself with the tshirt and put it on her trying to cover her up. She helps me wear it and zip it.
So, she was cold.

-Thank you.
She said with a cute voice and turns to look at me.

-Can you take me home?  I just... need to think some things alone.. and sleep.

-Sure.. Let's do that.

We are out of her house and I follow her till the doorsteps. She steps in but returns back immediately and gives me my jacket. It makes me wonder how she even thought about it with all these things on her mind right now. Her situation, made me even forget that I have a jacket either and gave it to her.

-If you need anything... and I mean Anything, just call me. Okay??

It sucks that I can't ask her to keep her company.
It sucks that I can't be sitting on the couch of the living room and check up on her while she sleeps.

And all these, because am her teacher.
The fact that she called me before when she needed me, makes me relieved for now that she will do it again if she needs anything,
I hope she won't need me but I want her to need me too.

                                    +++

"Growing old in a prison cell is not my thing. I rather ran, in body and soul. And if I can't take my body with me, at least my soul should run. "
                                  -Tokyo, La casa de papel.