Freezing - Unfreezing

51 | The Weekend

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Next morning I wait out of her house to pick her up. She opens the door and she seems sad.

-Good morning.
We say to each other. She starts walking to my car without saying a word, so I just follow her and get in. She is dying inside and I can't do or say anything.

-You don't have to worry about anything, Hayley. We will just see how your baby is going and you can hear the heartbeat.

Her doctor says putting that clear gel on her belly. I was sitting next to her. She was looking at me scared.
I hate that look at her and I love it at the same time.
I stare at her hand and put mine on top of it. She looks at me telling me thank you with her eyes. She needs me here. Something started beating and we turned to the screen.

-That's you baby's heartbeat Hayley.
The doctor says and Hayley stares at the screen and me at Hayley's reaction. I notice a tear on her face. It's not a tear you wanna wipe it..
It's a tear falling off a person's face, you start falling in love with; more.
The way she looks at the screen and hear the heartbeat, makes me relieved that she is thinking of it again.

-My baby's heartbeat?
She asks sweet and she wipes her eyes. The doctor smiles at her, so do I.

-You can clean yourself.. I wait you in my office..
The doctor says probably wanting to give us some privacy thinking we are a couple.
I hear her breathing fast.

-What's wrong???
I stand up and get closer to her. She puts her hands on her face to cover herself.

-How the hell I even made the thought of ending this baby's life??
She cries even more. She wants that baby now.

-Hayley? Look at me.
I say to her for several seconds until she finally turns her head.

-Look at me! It doesn't matter what you thought! It matters how you feel right now!

-No.. It matters.

-Hayley? How do you feel now???
I keep asking her. I want her to stop feeling bad about what she wanted before. I want her to know how normal is her first reaction and how important is that she is thinking about it.

-Am scared! I have a baby..
She tries to believe it and she gives me the most beautiful smile of her. The best thing about smiles is that no matter how beautiful you think it is, it will always be a better one. I stare at her, smiling and I am trying to imagine how better this smile can be after her baby is born.
We went back in doctor's office. He told us that everything was going good and we leave the hospital.
We take the downstairs and a guy stops when he sees us.

-Hayley.?
He calls her name unsure. Hayley was looking at him. She seems like she doesn't know him or doesn't remember him. I don't like him. His eyes are deep and dark. Like he tries to hide his dark personality with his shiny smile. Which by the way, his smile is annoying too. It's not a smile you have when you see someone you know. It looks like a dirty smile which belongs to a dirty mind. He checks every inch of her.

-Am Derek.. I work with your dad, remember?
She seems to remember now.

-Oh!Yes! Am sorryy..