Choices

Hello Again

Five years. Five long years, Tam was finally looking at Kam once more. He was sitting on the poolside. Tam's eyes drank in the vision that he had missed for so long. His Nong Kam, finally, is home. He was probably listening to music, Kam's head swayed a bit in time to the music that only he can hear.

As he stared at him, Tam realized he missed him, missed him too damn much. It was so upsetting to remember that he did not only choose a different university, but he also chose one that was outside the country. Damn UK! Tam was shocked was an understatement. He was floored when he found that his Nong was going to a school in the UK.

That was five years ago. Yes, it had been that long. Tam stewed as he remembered that since he left, Kam had cut off all communication with him. He didn't answer his emails or reply to text messages or even take his calls because he tried calling Kam more than once the moment, he wrangled the number from Kam's mother. He never received Tam's calls. He even forgot to greet him on his birthdays.

Remembering all these, Tam felt all the resentment surface and overcome the joy of seeing Kam again. He looked at him carefully; Kam's hair was longer now. It went just above his shoulder. He was a freaking model! He went to school in Oxford then later on became fashion model. Kam became a fashion model! Tam was so surprised when he found out. Kam as a child was very shy. He didn't even want his pictures taken. Tam would always drag him just to have it taken.

Kam was good looking. His looks are the kind that made your eyes follow him when he walks and would want you to stare at him for hours. But damn, he was even more beautiful now, if that was possible. He grew taller too. Tam had been following his progress as a model the moment it started when he graduated from Oxford. He even religiously bought magazines where Kam was in. It was the only way for Tam to see him.

He had kept close to Kam's family just to hear any word about him. Kam's parents were all surprised when Kam said he was not going back home as expected but he was also going to be a model and stay in UK. His Nong was doing so many things that he had said he would not do. He hated models because back then he said that models were practically just like robots that you wind up to do anything you like. Kam had said he hated models then ends up being one. WTF! This is what Tam's reaction was the moment he found out.

What was even crazier is that Kam had cut off all communication with him. No emails, texts or calls. What the hell was that? Strangely enough though, Kam always greeted Tam's parents on their birthdays and anniversaries. But not Tam, it was as if Tam was completely forgotten. Oh, he did get a greeting from him on his birthday, but it would always come from Dao. She would say on his birthday oh, by the way, Tam, happy birthday says Kam. Over the years, Tam doubted that it was really Kam who sent his greetings, or if Dao was just saying it to avoid hurting his feelings on his birthday.

Crazy thing is that he was beginning to suspect that he was right. Kam didn't want to greet him on his birthday and Dao was just saying it so that his parents wouldn't be upset. Once more he stared at the one person that Tam realized he missed talking to. Despite the age difference, Kam was the only one he can talk to without being judged. No matter how stupid his ideas were, Kam always listened to him, never laughed but once said, it was a part of who he was, so he would accept anything if it was coming from him.

His eyes drunk in the vision that was Kam, seated at the pool side listening to music. Music was Kam's safe place, being the introvert that he was. He actually cannot believe that he was seeing him again for the first time in five years. Those pictures in the magazine can never make up for the times he had missed his Nong, talking to him or even just sitting side by side never saying anything.