EGO & VENGEANCE

Chapter 21

Kelani

A week since I killed one of our rapists, a week since my closest friends and Mateos parents saw me murder another human being, a week days since I've felt numb.

In front of Mateo I acted like I was fine after i had killed his stepbrother. I was laughing and making jokes while Justin's body was bleeding right beside us. But inside, i felt my stomach churn and my chest constrict. Instead of feeling all that hatred release, I felt all that agony instead sit at the pit of my stomach, churning it even more. It wasn't guilt- because I don't regret a damn thing I did.

It was like all that pain and hurt that I'm carrying, both mine and Alaiyahs, wanted to leave but couldn't. And I don't think it will until i get rid of all three of our assaulters and abusers

I've killed before. Many times. But this one was with significance. It was personal. And I wanted it to give me abit of closure after finding out that he had silenced Alaiyah all that time. But I don't feel it. At least not yet.

As soon as I got home that day, I had opened the door to see Uncle Sam pacing in the kitchen. We don't really share hugs, but he pulled me into a warm one the day I killed one of my rapists; Alaiyahs abusive ex, Justin.

Justin was evil and conniving. He deserved that death, I don't fucking care. I just wish the people closest to me didn't have to see me like that.

I called Ace and Cherrie separately to apologise for what they saw, I felt I owed them an explanation. Obviously I couldn't give them a full one, so I told them that he abused and raped Alaiyah, my sister, and I wanted to avenge her since she ended her life. Which is true, but I still left out the fact that I was with her that night and also got raped, and that we were gang raped.

Ace understood right away, with no judgement and no questions. Given he's bestfriends with an assassin son of a mafia boss, I wasn't suprised. He told me that he was of course suprised that I was capable of murder, but that he deserved it anyway. He said he's here for me, and I can talk to him whenever necessary. Never judged me. But now, I think he has suspicions that I'm SaviourA

Cherrie on the other had, explained that she's been traumatised since that night and prefers not to talk about it. She said she was afraid of me, which is fair enough, but after explaining why I killed him, her fear turned to anger for Alaiyah. She said people like that deserve to die, she just didn't think she'd have to see it first hand.

She thanked me for protecting her and Mateos mum by saying they weren't in the house. She felt guilty that I had taken all that shit from Justin while she was hiding away, she explained that she was terrified for me when he was starting to sexually assault me.

After Justin ended the call with Mateo, he rubbed himself up against me, hit me and forced me down to my knees.

The shit he was saying made me shake "I know everything, Alaiyah told me alot of shit and you had no idea. Turns out you couldn't trust her". How much did he know? How much did he find out after what happened? Before it? I'm not sure.

I know she wouldn't have freely told that scumbag anything that happened after the fact, she was forced and threatened. He wanted to keep tormenting her. And he used me to do it.

All in all, we are fine now. Ace, Mateo, Cherrie and I are good. I just haven't seen them since that day when I put them all in danger, and killed Justin.

I'm just trying to calm myself, and take in what I've done. I'm ashamed to face everyone after they saw how I shifted to this merciless cold thing with a gun. They didn't need to see all that. But I don't feel guilt for what I did. And I would do it again if it was for vengeance for my sister.