The 18th Floor

Chapter Twenty Five

Lucien's POV

I leave my room with her in it, despite wanting to lay down next to her, and head over to the kitchen to get a drink. I know I won't be able to sleep right now.

I wait half an hour before I hear her stop tossing and turning. I pop my head in to make sure she's asleep before I head into the bathroom. I need to finish what we started. I wanted her to be the one to do so, but I can't. Not now. I turn the shower on to the coldest possible setting and step in, thinking of everything that just happened between us until I get my release.

I struggle to control my breathing but nothing comes close to her touch on my skin. Her lips with mine. It was insanity. I felt like I was everywhere all at once, inside her, around her, with her. There's not a single word vast enough that is able to encapsulate what we just experienced. We barely took our clothes off and she reduced me to a state I've had difficulty reaching before. I don't want to think of others, not when I'm with her, but in my life has ever come close. No experience, big or small.

I was scared she was going to say no, when I first asked to kiss her, but I knew, somehow when she was saying thank you, I knew she wouldn't say no. I didn't expect us to come to this point, but I need more. All I want to do is go and lie down next to her, breathing her in. I know we probably crossed boundaries we shouldn't as her boss, but fuck it. I can't hold out any longer.

I get out the shower and change back, brushing my teeth and going to lie down on the opposite end of the sofa to Simon.

"You my friend, are truly fucked", Simon says quietly. My breathing stills at his words.

"Simon."

"What are you doing, Lucien?", he says as he sits up to face me.

"How much did you hear?"

"Enough."

"Fuck off Simon, we didn't do anything", I grumble out as I turn away from him.

I feel the smirk on his face as he mumbles, "yet," under his breath.

Yet. There's more to come.

"Ignore me all you like Lucien, but just make sure it ends well." He sounds angry, annoyed even. I don't want to have this conversation with him now, but he's right. We may have not done a lot, but it will change everything from now on.

I start to wonder if we done the right thing, not for my sake but for Cyrene. If she'll wake up tomorrow morning and blame it all on the alcohol, if I'll get a resignation letter on my desk Monday morning. I can't think about that right now, that's the last thing I want. Whatever happens, I can't let it interfere with our work. But she's already so entangled with every aspect of my life, she's all I can think about.

Fuck me.

This girl will be my ruination.